Saving Me (A SHATTER ME FANFIC)

F R O S T B I T E

   I GASP AWAKE AND PROP UP ON MY ELBOWS, my breathing shallow. A shiver licks its way up my spine as I wrap my arms around myself and try not to cry. My efforts seem pointless as moisture leaks from the corner of my eyes anyway. Dim lights turn on detecting my consciousness. Trying to calm my stuttering heart, I slip out of bed and pad my way towards the bathroom. The floor cool and slippery beneath my bare feet.

  The automatic lights flicker on, the brightness nearly blinding me as I step underneath the shower head. I adjust the water till its temperature is low enough to make me flinch and force myself to stand underneath the nerve-numbing spray of cold. The water numbs out all heat and tension in my body leaving nothing but a frozen body in its wake.

I step out of the shower, wet clothes sticking to my skin. I turn the faucet on to fill the bathtub with normal tempered water and step inside the tub. I lay down and stretch my legs in front of me. My teeth chatter and my lips quiver from the lack of warmth but I ignore it and concentrate on the chill in my bones rather than the burning in my heart.

I watch the tub fill with water, watch my body sink into its sparkling depth. I turn the tap off until water splotches off from the brims.

Silence.

Ruthless silence greets my shivering body.

I lay horizontally, facing the gleaming ceiling and sink into the depth. Holding my breath, I close my eyes in the clearing of water as the flashbacks overwhelm my head again.

"Little baby."

His venomous tone echoes throughout the empty space around me even though he's standing outside in the hallway. My little hands cover my ears as I rock back and forth and back and forth and back and forth, hiding inside the tiny little cupboard.

"I'm invisible." I chant in my head, keeping my eyes pressed shut. "I'm invisible. I'm invisible. I'm invisible. I'm invisible. I'm invisible. I'm invisible. I'm invisible. I'm invisible. I'm invisible. He can't see me. He can't see me. He can't see me. He can't see me. He can't see me. He won't see me. He won't see me—"

The door to the room clicks open and I bite my lip forcing myself not to scream.

"He can't touch me. He can't hurt me." Tears flow down my chubby cheeks.

"I know you're in here." His voice is hollow. "I'd love it if you would come out and stop hiding from me. I promise we can play your favorite game."

"Go away. Go away. Go away. Go away. Go away. Go away." I think as I press my eyes against my knees, shudders racking my little body.

"What was it called again?" The door creaks open and I hold my breath as more tears break out. He moves around my room. "Tag you're it?"

"Leave me alone. Leave me alone. Leave me alone. Leave me alone. Leave me alone."

"I'm up for some tag you're it, if you are."

I clench my teeth and bite down a whimper as I feel his silhouette move towards the cupboard, his scent a few feet away from me.

I stop breathing.

The door jerks open and I let out a bellowing scream.

"DON'T TOUCH ME. PLEASE. JUST— Don't touch me. Don't touch me. Don't touch me. Let me go." I scream desperately, thrashing against the arms trying to hold me.

"Rachel. Rachel." The voice is deep and serene. "Calm down. It's ok."

"Don't hurt me, please." Tears seep out of my closed eyes, I dare not open.