Internal cry

How... could you?

Chapter 10

Ella's P.O.V:

"Mony?" I yelled up the stairs of our Victorian house. It wasn't big or beautiful, but apparently the house ran in the family so the bills were less expensive. I can't afford to buy us a bigger, proper house. The house is starting to leak and the wooden floors creak with age but it's all we can afford.

"Yeah!" Came her distant respond. She was probably brushing her teeth. She keeps a stern schedule and it was time for her to go to bed.

"Bedtime!" I reminded her. I couldn't see her, but I knew she was rolling her eyes at my motherly tone.

"I know, El. You don't need to remind me!" she yelled back. Her words were muffled.

Definitely brushing her teeth.

I head upstairs to her bedroom and sigh when I see the mess. Her clothes were strewn everywhere and it looked like she was on a killing spree with the amount of books, bags and other things lying around everywhere.

"What did you do in here?" I asked and started folding up the clothes. I was halfway done when she came strolling in. She shot me a guilty look before helping me fold and hang up the rest of the clothes. Then she quickly threw her towel over her door and got in her bed.

I bit the inside of my cheek to keep from smiling. She was twelve years old and was starting to act like a teenager, but she still needed me to tuck her in. I suppose if you have a crazed mother and a drunk for a father you tend to depend on the one person who treated you like an actual human being. Wow, my parents really are messed up.

I brushed a stray piece of hair from her face and pulled the sheets up to her chin. She looked at me with her ice blue eyes and I grimaced when the the realization finally sank in. This messed up, unbelieve life was hers. She didn't deserve this. She deserved to be treated like a princess in a castle, but instead she got a messed up dad and a crazy mom.

"Are you going to be okay?" she asked me, concern lacing her tone.

I wish

"Of course, sweetie. Don't you worry about me. Just go to sleep, okay?" I told her. She nodded and closed her eyes. She let out a content sigh and her breathing deepened. I smiled at her sleeping figure and kissed her forehead.

"Sleep tight, Mony." I whispered to her before pulling up the covers a little more and closing her curtains. I tip toed out of her room and sighed before turning around and locking her door just in case our father got past me. I hid the key in the towel closet and headed downstairs to do my homework.

Here we go again, history homework.

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12:06

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I glanced at the clock above my bookcase in irritation. He should've been back by now, not that I'm complaining, but I needed to go to sleep and I couldn't risk going to sleep if he wasn't passed out somewhere. I counted the pages I had left and with a sigh I started reading again.

A shiver ran through me when the front door banged open with a thump and my father came stumbling in. He couldn't see me yet so I put my books aside and moved away from the couch. I didn't want to fall and hit my head against a sharp edge. That would be difficult to hide.

The disgusting sound of my father's drunken laughter filled the room, followed by a burp and a hiccup. I heard him stumble towards the living room. I swallowed the lump in my throat. When I looked up again his silhoutte darkened the doorway and he looked at me in bewilderment like we haven't gone through this thousands of times already.

"What are you doing here!" he yelled with a hiccup. His face was contorted with an angry sneer and his hands were shaking. I resisted the urge to scowl at him and instead said as calmly as I could.

"I was waiting for you to get home." His sneer deepened into something else. I involuntarily took a step backwards.

"Don't talk back to me!" He boomed and I winced. This is what it is like with him, every move I make is wrong. Speak – wrong, don't speak – wrong. There is no right in his eyes.

"Please lower your voice, Harmony is asleep." I whispered to him with fear motivating every step I took away from him. He let out a growl and launched towards me. I hurriedly moved out of the way causing him to fall on the ground where I stood just a moment earlier.

"Please, let's just go to sleep." I tried to plead with him one last time. He stood up with shaking arms and stumbled towards me.

"Don't order me around you horrid piece of..." I refuse to write down the next few words that fell from his filthy mouth. I tried to correct my mistake and calm him down, but his gaze was set on the wall furtherst from me.

"Of course, sorry father." It pained me to say those words but I needed to keep Harmony safe and try to minimize the damage.

"Don't call me that!" he shrieked before jumping towards me again. I wasn't fast enough to escape him this time and his vice like grip entrapped my arm. I cried out in pain but quickly stifled my cry, afraid of waking up Harmony. For the thousandth time I offered a silent prayer to whoever was listening.

Please, don't let it hurt too much.

But like the other thousands of times it seems whoever was supposed to listen decided to turn a blind eye and I was wrenched towards his vile body. He grabbed my other arm and with a groan threw me over his shoulder. My body twisted and I hit the wall behind him with my back. I bit back a cry of pain when I landed on my stomach and tried to regain my breath. My lungs were on fire and my breath is ragged.

I used my free arm to try and get myself up. I used the wall for support and closed my eyes for a second to try and get air back into my lungs. A gasp escaped my lips as he grabbed my forearms again. Against my better judgment I tried to push him away, but even in his drunken state he was stronger than me and he didn't budge. Instead he grabbed my hair and pulled me towards the floor. The searing pain in my head forced me to follow and I fell to the ground still gasping for air.

I cried in silence when he pulled off his belt and raised it above his head. Out of instinct my hands lifted to shield my face and a burning pain seared through my forearms. Silent tears of betrayal flowed freely down my cheeks. His belt hit me everywhere. My entire body was flaring in pain but the pain in my heart, the hurt and the betrayal was more painful than anything he could ever do to me.

Whoosh.

Whoosh

Whoosh

'Why father? What did I do wrong to deserve your hatred?'