Coming Home // Sidemen AU (Minizerk)

Sketches

"What do you want for Christmas, Josh?"

"Nuffin."

Simon sighed. The two eight year olds were sat on the park bench, both dressed up warmly to protect their small bodies from the chilly winter winds. Josh's hat was pulled so far down it was almost over his eyes and Simon's scarf had been wrapped so tightly by his mother that it was almost suffocating him. Squashed up close together though, they were able to keep most of the cold at bay.

The blond gave his friend a nudge. "C'mon, it's so annoying when people say that. I'm gonna get you something no matter what you say, so it might as well be something you want." Simon wasn't about to give up that easily. He was definitely one of those kids who much preferred giving gifts over receiving them, and the gift for his best friend was quite possibly the most important, even more than the ones for his parents and brothers. "What d'you want?"

"Why this year?" his friend asked. "You've never cared before," he murmured.

"Not true," Simon feigned indignation, "it's just I never had enough money to buy people gifts, so my parents got them."

"So you're telling me it wasn't you who picked out those Nemo socks last year?" Josh smirked at Simon's face as he was caught out, before slumping his shoulders. "I can't get you anything, you know that," he pointed out quietly.

Simon shook his head. "It doesn't matter," he said firmly.

"No?" Josh queried, raising one eyebrow at him. "It should."

Simon sighed, wrapping an arm around his friend's shoulders. "What's wrong with the drawings?" he questioned.

"They're not worth anything," the smaller boy mumbled.

"Of course they are. They're awesome and they came from you," the blond proclaimed. "They're all in my room y'know," he said with pride.

Josh gave him a somewhat wistful look. "Why don't you draw me something then?" he suggested.

"Because I'm crap at drawing, unless you're happy with stickmen." They both laughed and Simon leaned his head onto Josh's shoulder, looking up at him with pleading blue eyes. "Please," he begged, "I want to give you something special this Christmas."

Josh was silent for a bit, long enough for Simon to assume his request was going to be left unanswered, but then the boy murmured something quietly; so quiet that it was only the condensation coming from his mouth opening and closing that assured the blond he had actually spoken. It sounded like Josh had said: "Family," but that only confused Simon more, and he sat up straight with a confused expression.

"Huh?"

Josh didn't repeat what he'd just said but continued to mumble. "That's what Christmas is meant to be about, right?" He gave Simon a sad half smile. "I ain't ever had that. Not at Christmas. Not never."

"Not ever," Simon corrected before he could stop himself, lowering his head when Josh glared at him. "Sorry...your mum loves you though Josh, she's family," he pointed out. Josh was always going on about how much the woman had given up for him and how everything she did, she did for him.

But now Josh's features turned dark, his hazel eyes narrowing. "She doesn't," he replied simply. "She acts like she does, or at least tries to; but she don't even love herself, and until she loves herself she can't nev...ever love me. Not properly."

Simon stared at his friend's face, the upset clear. "I don't get it," he started, trailing off when Josh suddenly shrugged him away.

"No...why should you?" the boy retorted, sending the blond one of his rare angry looks, like he was blaming him for something.