Autumn Has Fallen | Dramione

depressed.

I'm sorry this is not a chapter and I might delete this soon but I just want you guys to know that I may be going for a short time because of little ol' depression.

Now for those who have experienced this I'm sorry and I hope you feel well sooner or later.

Depression is not only about pure utter sadness, it's like waking up in a beautiful sunny day but you can't feel anything at all. As if coming out of bed is already a big effort to make. You're basically bed-ridden. You'd find yourself either staring blankly at the ceiling or feeling fatigue.
And even if you do get out of bed your brain would either think darkly, or do nothing at all.

And that's exactly what I've been feeling these past few days. Sometimes I even ask myself if I'm all right, do I want to write a new chapter, and I certainely don't feel anything, and I end up crying myself to sleep at night because that was the only possible way to send myself to sleep.

I mean, I've done multiple things to unwind. Currently I'm re-reading my harry potter books but I've been stuck at prisoner of azkaban for almost have a week now. It doesn't mean that I don't like it, I just don't feel like reading and I end up being tired all of a sudden.

My ability to write a new chapter is also something that depression is trying to destroy. I admit I haven't done chapter 17 yet and it's stuck in the process up until now even though it's supposed to come out maybe tomorrow.

I've been through this before. It's not new to me at all. But before, I knew how to manage it properly by distracting myself, hanging out with friends or simply trying to focus on my studies. I'm only 16 and I've kept on telling myself that "what if this is just a phase? It could go away" but now it's not really doing anything to me.

I'm sorry in advance if you get a slow update. I'm really trying my best to make it great for you all because you've been great to me and I love you all.

If you guys know someone who's feeling the same way or if you are feeling the same way, please go seek advice from your family or your friends. But I suggest a family member who can listen to you. Please do before it gets worse.

For me i'm still trying to figure out a way on how to manage my own problem, so don't worry.

Again, thank you so much for all your support and as always, see you in the next chapter x

-ell