Part 48

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As I woke up, the midday sun shining through the curtains, I kept my head rested on Daryl's chest; the rhythmic breathing giving me continued comfort.

Even though the worst of everything seemed to be over, I couldn't stop thinking about Carl and worrying if he was going to be ok or not. He's such a good kid and reminds me so much of Mason I just- I wish that it wouldn't have been him.

I let out a tired sigh before slowly pushing myself off Daryl's chest, careful not to wake him but soon realizing he was already awake as our eyes met.

"Oh- sorry," I brushed my hair out of my face, "I didn't know you were already awake."

He shrugged, "Ya sleep ok?"

"Mhm." I nodded as I looked around the room, not really paying attention as my mind stayed on other things.

"Hey," he said as he sat up, catching my focus again, "We ain't talk about what happened here yet.. you ok?"

I sat quietly for a second, trying to decide whether or not to tell him the truth or lie to him; tell him I was fine or that I felt like I was completely falling apart inside all over again.

I slowly shook my head before looking back up at him, "Can we talk about it later?"

His worried eyes stared into mine before he nodded, "Yeah; I gotta help with everythin' outside anyways."

***

After Daryl left, I soon got dressed and headed downstairs and out the front door.
I wanted to talk to him about everything that happened; the strangers, the herd, everyone that we lost, but I had something much heavier weighing on my mind right now.

As I walked down the road, stepping over walkers from the night before, all I hoped was that, when I got to the infirmary, Carl was still alive.

I let out a steady breath, trying to relax myself, before pushing the door open, seeing Rick as he leaned up against one of the tables; his eyes tired and showing that he clearly hadn't got much sleep.

As he saw me, he immediately came over and pulled me into a hug.

"Thank you," He breathed quietly as he held me tighter, "Thank you."

I pulled away as I looked up at him, a weak sigh leaving my lips, "I should've done more-- I could've.. and I didn't."

He furrowed his eyebrows at me, cocking his head as he tried to understand what I was referring to.

"Carl shouldn't have been shot," my voice weakly let out, "If I just stood somewhere else it- it could've been me and then everything would be ok-"

"Nothing would be ok if that happened, Liz," Rick cut me off, "What Ron did isn't your fault-- it's nobody's."

I shook my head as a tear rolled down my cheek, "It shouldn't have happened to him."

"It shouldn't have happened to you either-"

"He has potential, Rick," I said, pointing at the door to the room Carl was in, "Your son has a future in this world-"

"And you don't?" He questioned.

I stayed quiet, swallowing harshly before speaking up again, "Is he gonna make it?"

I felt Rick stare at me as my eyes refused to make contact with his, before he let out a sigh, "Denise says he is."

"Ok." I nodded quietly before turning and leaving out the door without another word.

***

As I walked through the street, I found myself just wanting to get away from everything-- from all of this.. not forever, I wasn't even sure for how long, but I just felt like I needed to be alone. Maybe if I was outside of these walls, things here would get better, I wouldn't feel the way I'm feeling, and people would stay alive. While I continued my thoughts, I nearly collided with Daryl as he came from around the corner with a wheelbarrow filled with bodies.

"What happened?" He flicked his head toward me, noticing my emotional state, as he set down the wheelbarrow.

I shook my head, wiping away any stray tears and pushing away the emotion I was feeling, "Will you teach me how to drive?"

He stepped back, furrowing his eyebrows at my request, "Why?"

"I want to go on runs again; I'm ready, I dealt with the herd-" I went on before getting cut off.

"Why?" He asked again, more harsh and seeming to not buy my reasoning.

I lightly scoffed as I shook my head, "If you're not gonna do it, I'll just get someone else to."

He studied my face for a moment before picking the wheelbarrow back up again, " 'Kay."

"You'll do it?" I asked, hopeful, as he began pushing it down the road.

"No." He murmured lowly as he continued on, leaving me where I stood.

I let out a defeated sigh, walking through the streets again before I stumbled upon Maggie and Enid as they picked up bodies as well.

"Hey, Maggie-" I began before getting cut off.

"Oh Liz, just the person we needed," she chuckled as she straightened up, "I need to go help real quick with the new wall, do you think you could help Enid pick up some of these walkers?"

My eyes glanced from Maggie down to Enid, someone I really hadn't talked to much or gotten to know at all, before I nodded, "Yeah, sure."

"Thank you so much, hun," she smiled, "I'll be back as quick as I can."

I nodded again, walking over to where Enid stood and grabbing at the shoulders of a walker while she grabbed the legs, before we both lugged it over and into a nearby wheelbarrow.

"So," I huffed, "Heard you left the other day; climbed the wall?"

She rolled her eyes, moving over to the next body, "I already got lectured by multiple people today, I don't need another-"

"Show me how you did it." I stopped her, slight shock on her face at my request, "I want to leave."


_____
A bit of tension?

What do you thinks gonna happen? Is Enid gonna help her leave Alexandria? Is she even gonna leave at all?

I'd love to know you thoughts and predictions about everything that happened in this chapter.

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