TF2 x Reader Oneshots

Sniper X Reader

Prize for irisiwa, congratulations on being our first place winner in the contest!

Sorry for the wait!

You skipped into the base with a wide smile adorning your already radiant face. In your hands were tiny many blue envelopes, and in your grip, small wrinkles have formed on the sides, try as you might to be careful with their feeble surface.

"Hey guys!" you cried out, partly out of excitement and partly out of wanting to be acknowledged.

Your little stunt startled a few teammates, among of which was Demo, who choked down on the liquor he was drinking. Despite the Scot coughing and wheezing in the background, the glint in your eye remained, and you wasted no time breaking the ice to all of those present in the mess hall.

"Whatcha got there, darlin'?" Dell asked, taking a pause from fixing the air conditioner to recognize your rather excited presence.

"Guys, I have news from the administrator!" you squealed with a jump.

"She'll cut our taxes!" Jeremy guessed, taking context from the sound of your voice.

You shook your head: "Even better!"

Jane pounded a fist onto the table. "We get to fight those darn communists! I'm comin' for ya Christopher...!"

"A little unnerving, but still no."

"Just tell us what it is, ma cherie," Spy said tersely, blowing another drag of his cigarette.

You rolled your eyes and gave out a sigh: Kill joy.

"The Administrator is going to let us go out on a camping trip in the mountains- isn't that great?!"

The room went silent, and the music of the crickets were heard as clear as day. It filled the air like a glorious symphony, and in response, you rolled your eyes and threw your arms vehemently out into the air.

"Oh come on!" you wailed. "It's the mountains guys- mountains!"

"Hey, you know what else is great?" Scout asked, throwing his baseball playfully into the air. "Not getting car sick."

The others recoiled at the thought and memories of enduring sick stomachs while trying to sleep amidst bumpy roads and uncomfortable sleeping decisions. Other times, some nutjob would place really strong air fresheners to scent the whole car, and not even halfway through the trip, you'd have a bunch of green mercenaries holding handkerchiefs to their mouths and noses in an attempt to obstruct the smell, and comfort themselves with the scent of home.

What a nightmare.

"There'll be no air fresheners this time," you insisted, and we'll find a smooth pathway to keep your mind off the road."

Demo looked up, starting to reconsider.

"Can I bring me booze?" he asked.

The room went quiet as he waited for an answer.

"Fine...just don't puke in the car."

"I can't promise that."

"Can I bring my papers?" Medic asked, stepping out of the infirmary.

"No!" you said firmly. "This is a time to relax- and who knows, maybe you'll be able to meet a lady friend out there without your nose buried in your papers all the time."

"Are you setting me up for a relationship?" the doctor deadpanned. "I'm not exactly into zhat kind of thing."

Archimedes puffed his chest feathers out and ruffled his body rather indignantly. He cooed and cooed, sounding pissed and annoyed.