Wedding Flowers [Completed]

BONUS CHAPTER 3

Unedited.. :)

Ryder is laying on the couch with half-lidded eyes. I'm making the twins dinner, feeding the dogs, and making sure everyone stays alive.

Not as easy as it seems.

I hear a scream from the living room where it looks like Lily threw a wooden block at Sammy's head.

Who the fuck thought wooden toys were smart for toddlers?

"Not nice. We don't throw," I scold and pick up Sammy. Lily basically rolls her eyes and tells me to leave her alone. She's definitely my kid.

They eat, I bathe them and am soaked by the time they are finished. At least they fall asleep in minutes and leave me to go take care of Ryder.

He is finally coherent when I get down stairs. Sitting up on the couch, the dogs on either side of him.

"Hi, baby," Ryder says smiling. He fell while working and broke his leg. He has a large cast from his foot to mid thigh. He is basically immobile and it's fucking annoying.

I take a deep breath, "I want you to quit."

He looks like I've slapped him. I want to. "What the hell? No."

"I'm sick of this," I say gesturing to his leg. I don't mention the scars of his burns from the last time he got seriously hurt.

"You knew what you were getting into. We talked about this," he says. I can tell he is trying to stay in control of his anger. We don't fight often but when we do it's an all out screaming match.

Neither of us gives up quickly.

"That was before Sammy and Lily. Do you really want them to grow up without a dad? You're, like, prone to accidents. Does anyone else get hurt like this?" I can't stop talking. My hands moving in frantic motions and I keep pacing. The dogs are even interested in this conversation.

I bet the fucking dogs would want to live with him if we got divorced. Even Boomer. Traitor.

"Everyone gets hurt. I've gotten hurt twice in almost three years," he argues.

"Seriously hurt twice!!" I try to control my volume.

He stands up and wobbles over to me, without his crutches. He puts his hands on my cheeks, "I love you and I love them. I'll be more careful."

"You said that last time. Quit." I move my face away and he drops his hands and hangs his head.

"I can't. Come on, Ads," he says.

I shake my head, tears fall down my face like a waterfall. I can't have him die on us. I just can't. When I think of our life without him it sends my mind spinning. Every single time he leaves the house to go to work I can barely sleep.

I tell him that, "I wait for a phone call or even worse a knock on the door telling me you aren't coming home. Do you know how hard it is to live like that? Maybe I'd feel differently if you weren't laying in a hospital bed a few years ago and standing here now in a cast up to your balls. I'm fucking done, Ryder. I can't do this anymore."

"So you're saying my career or you three? Are those really the choices you're giving me?" Ryder is so calm that I'm getting nervous. His eyes are narrowed and he is speaking slowly and quietly. I wonder if it's so he won't wake the girls up or if it's because he is trying to remain in control.

I know how horrible it sounds. I know that what I'm doing is wrong but I don't know what else to do. I stand there silently while Ryder watches me intently. He is waiting for me to make the next move but I'm out of plays.