Downright Delinquents

Chapter Twenty Three

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Dedication: Collarxbones for the awesome cover on the side. Thanks! <3

Recap: Reaching out again, successfully, this time, our hands met. Her fingertips lightly ran over my rough and hardened ones. My long nails were now broken and jagged. She used to envy my hands. Now look at them.

She sighed, closing her hand around mine, interlacing our fingers.

"What the hell happened to you?"

So, for the first time, I told someone.

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She didn't interrupt.

I was glad for it.

Once I started, I couldn't stop. It was like words, emotions and feelings I have held inside for so long, began bubbling to the service. I cried a few times, but declined her touch of comfort. I didn't want her sympathy; I just wanted her to listen.

Anyone, to listen.

I should have told Colin when I had the chance. Telling someone about it was scary, but at the same time, refreshing. I never really took it seriously when people said that, 'bottling up your emotions is unhealthy', until now. I hadn't registered how desperately I needed to tell someone, anyone, the mess that was scattered in my brain. It felt so unbelievably good to just talk about it.

I never thought I would feel this way, about talking about the very thing that ruined my life.

Once my essay and a half was finished, my chest was rising and falling. My cheeks were hot and my breathing short. I rubbed wearily at my eyes and rolled my lips into my mouth. Silence hung between us for a few moments, both of us taking a second to gather our thoughts.

"Wow."

"Yeah." A bubble of laughter escaped my lips. I sounded slightly hysterical. "I know."

"Damn."

"I know."

We stared at each other. I don't know how long it was for, but we both seemed to share a mutual acceptance. She knew I didn't want to be hugged and told everything was alright. She knew, she just had to listen and be here for me.

She cleared her throat uneasily. "Would you... would you like to come stay with me one weekend? I'll come get you and drop you home. If you want to? I mean, I heard you have visitation rights or something..."

My heart twitched. It had to. That was the only way to describe the feeling inside my chest. I pulled her to me and buried my face into her shoulder, sobbing.

A month ago, if someone had told me I would be hugging my ex-best friend, after having poured my entire life story to her, I would have laughed. And probably punched them in the face. So having this as my reality, was still shocking to me. I actually don't think it has really hit me. Later tonight, when I'm finally alone, it will all sink it and I will cry silently into my pillow, so Imogen doesn't realise how much this day has affected me.

I know it will happen.

"Is that a yes?" she laughed, embracing me back.

I stepped backwards, wiping at my eyes. All I could do was nod. A genuine smile, which was rare, stretched across my face. My head kept nodding, as though I couldn't emphasise how amazing that would be.

For so long, I thought that all my friends hated me. It was honestly such a relief and refreshing feeling to know that they were still there for me. Still had my back, although I turned mine on theirs. My chest ached and tears stung at my eyes again.