Chapter 32 - "You wore a paper bag in elementary school too."

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Elliot glared at her computer screen and the blank page on it, annoyed that it was not trembling before her and doing her bidding. Her mother's advice of starting something new floated through her head, but even her mind seemed stubborn to that idea, producing no new spark. The sound of tapping keys filled the office and only seemed to add to the annoyance that was mounting in her. The clock ticked on, taunting her by calling out each minute that passed by that not a single word came to her. The tapping stopped and Beck glanced up at Elliot.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked.

"No," she said, not looking at him.

Beck stared at her a second longer, but didn't gain any eye contact for his efforts. Elliot continued her silent threatening of her computer, but still received a blank look in return. Beck eventually went back to writing, his gaze flickering up to her every so often.

Finally, he put his computer aside and leaned over his knees, his expression concerned.

"What's going on, Elliot?" he said.

She gave him no reply.

"El?"

His use of her nickname almost broke her resolve not to look at him, but she dug in her metaphorical heels and continued to stare at the computer.

"Is there a reason you are avoiding looking at me?" Beck asked.

"Yes. I don't feel like blurting something out and you just have one of those blurt-out-everything-in-your-head sort of faces."

"Would it help if I wore a paper bag?" he asked. "I haven't done that since elementary school but if it helps you, I will do it."

Elliot looked up at him.

"You wore a paper bag in elementary school too."

Beck smiled.

"Dang it!" she said, looking away.

"El, just tell me what's going on with you. Maybe I can help."

Elliot rubbed her face, trying to rid herself of her jumbled thoughts.

"Of course you can help."

"So then why aren't you letting me?"

"Because that's the problem."

"The problem is I can help you? I can see why you're avoiding it."

Lowering her hands, she scowled at him as he tried to hid his amusement at the conversation. They stared at each other, neither backing down. Elliot snapped her computer closed and tossed it on to the couch. Beck straightened, waiting. Grabbing her purse, Elliot stood.

"Where are we going?" he asked, shutting his computer and picking up his own satchel.

"I don't know!"

Beck made no comment and followed her out the door. Without thinking about it, she turned left out of the building and walked, Beck beside her. They moved through the city thoughtlessly, taking random turns, sometimes doubling back and other times, making circles. Through it all, they remained silent, Beck following Elliot's lead.

The city bustled on, ignoring Elliot and flaunting its sense of busyness. As the office grew further away, Elliot's annoyance began to lessen. When the parade of doubtful thoughts slowly exhausted itself out, she pulled her gaze up from the pavement and looked around. Beck looked at her, his list of speculations dying away at the calm look on her face.

"Come on," she said.

They abruptly stopped and spun around, back tracking. Beck said nothing, though a hundred new questions had popped into his mind. They made their way through the crowded streets, stopping before the store front of a Barnes and Noble. Elliot pushed the door open and stepped inside. A smile spread across her lips at the sight of shelves and shelves of books.

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