to all the glowing eyes ✎ joshler

october 18

sadly, there isn't anything written for the next day. this bumps josh a little. he is so invested on tyler's life, he wants to know all about him.

striking up a conversation isn't a really good idea. what if he messed up and mentions the journal? he can't run that risk.

he keeps staring into space until his friend, jon, touches his shoulder. "josh, snap out of it. we want your opinion."

"my opinion? on what?"josh asks openly to his friends.

"on the team getaway?"dallon says hoping that his friend can remember,"you were the one who suggested it in the first place."

"right. um, i can't this weekend,"he lies.

"what? why?"brendon asks.

"'m busy with homework. i got this essay to finish."

pete cocks an eyebrow. unlike the rest of the table, he is not buying what josh's telling,"about what?"

"psychology stuff. nothing exciting."

"can't you do it during practice tomorrow?"pete pressures.

"in this economy? are you crazy?"brendon jokes in a semi-serious tone. the whole table laughs, even the skeptical pete joins in.

the conversation turns back to the former mentioned getaway. josh barely pays any attention to what is being said, he mostly focuses on his own thoughts.

he remembers the pretty yellow flower inside the journal. it makes him happy.

yellow is a happy color.

he is a happy guy.

he thinks about tyler as well. his precious boy isn't happy. that hurts him a little bit.

he knows you can't fix a person in tyler's conditions. but he wants to be there and do as much as he can to make sure he is doing just fine.

maybe then he can give the sophomore the yellow flower.

yellow is a happy color.

he is a happy guy.

{🌹💌🌹}

it's been ages since i've updated this book

i had an anxiety attack on saturday so it gave me inspiration to write like 4 other chapters yay

also, do yourself a favor and listen to the band milkk; they're 10/10

-alaska