It Only Happens In My Fantasies

I'm Perfectly Fine

"After you left, not much has happened..... My days just got more boring and sad. It was as if everything were dull. Your presence really did mean that much..... But I guess my presence didn't mean that much to you. "

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After the bell, I settle my things into my backpack and carry my purple binder on my arm. I had a student council meeting today, being held in Mrs. Trainor's room after that one incident a couple of months back with Heather and Jonah.

Usually, I don't look forward to these meetings anymore, since I only wanted to go home and wait for the day Jason would return, but I actually enjoyed these particular meetings a bit. That was only because it was December and we would go Christmas caroling at the senior centers around town, and I love to sing.

"Let's go!"Marian sang as we walked out of our English class and towards the seventh grade hallways. We spoke about nonsense and sang along the way to the seventh grade social studies hall until we finally got there. We walked in and signed the sign in sheet, and Marian reluctantly went to her place next to Heather at the computer to choose the caroling music to practice.

The desks were arranged in "U"s, one surrounding the other. Green and Red folders containing the music, in case some didn't know "Merry Christmas" and such already, sat atop of the desks.

Everything was almost the same as the last meeting, minus one thing I noticed when I put my backpack down and took a seat.

There was someone new in the group today.

To my left,  Cameron was sitting with his leg crossed under him to sit up better. I recognized him from my 3rd-4th English class period from last year. This year, I had him for second period science. We didn't talk much, but we had texted a couple of times before, and what I knew about him from seventh grade made me extremely eager to be his friend.

It's sort of like a platonic crush, really. I just really wanted to sit next to him, talk about stupid things that actually matter to us, to laugh with each other, to go to places as friends and invite each other over - stuff like in the books or (let's be more realistic here) things my mom would probably not let me do until she met him, his entire family, or even inspected his personal records.

When I found out he was in my second period, I thought that maybe that was my chance to actually talk to him without interruptions or his other friends getting in the way. But until now, we haven't had that chance yet(we sit a row and three columns away from each other).

So I was pleasantly surprised that he was here, in person, joining student council. I smiled at him, seeing it as a step towards possible future communication other than texting.

I waited patiently for the girls to play the first song to sing when Cameron suddenly took the seat one desk away from me. I smiled a bit. Maybe I'll get a chance to talk to him here!

Karol placed the sign in/out sheet on the desk between us and asked if we could hold it. I nodded yes.

And that's when Cameron scooted to the seat next to me. I found it a bit peculiar( cause, well, we never talk!) but comfortable at the same time. I crossed my fingers that I would walk out of here with a new friend.

Eventually, Marian and Heather played the first song, which I believe was Holy Night (the worst we know by far) and we all had to begin singing.

After a few songs, we went to Here Comes Santa Clause. The pictures on the screen were very peculiar, but we all just shrugged them off and sang  along to the words on the large Promethean board. We sang the same chorus over and over until we finally reached what we thought was the end of the song.....