are we jus gonna pretend that simon and raphael actually get along bc i refuse to believe raphael hates simon? yes. yes we are. also if any of u guys stan bts then listen to yoongi's solo 'first love' yes im aware hes writing jt abt a piANO BUT ITS WHAT I KISTENED TO WHILE WRITING THIS OKAH SO HUSH. and if u dont stan bts then what're u doin fam. stan bts.
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It had been several weeks since Simon had discovered he was a daylighter. He felt beyond conflicted, his heart jumped so fast at the idea of being able to live a normal life again. Simon couldn't wait to attempt to get a tan under the summer sun (however due to his paleness it didn't work out most of the time), he couldn't wait to go back to university and study something he actually wanted to study (after having his life taken from him he decided to do things his way. study things he wanted to study. eat what he wanted to eat. travel were he wanted to travel, he couldn't wait to eat his mum's food again without the feeling like it's traveling back up his throat for hours after until he finally did throw the delicious food back up. He couldn't wait to be normal again.
Despite all this his heart broke instantly when he thought about Raphael. The man he loved beyond words. The man he already lost once.
Simon was currently sat next to Raphael, the moon shining brightly making Raphael's natural tan glow in the most ethereal way to Simon. His heart felt heavy as his mind wondered off into a life without Raphael, a life without laughing with Raphael under the stars of the city, a life without hearing Raphael sing in the shower through the hotel walls, a life without hearing Raphael curse in Spanish as Simon pleases him in the most desirable way anyone could ever imagine, a life without Raphael is simply a life Simon didn't want to have to go through. But he just couldn't pass up the opportunity to be at least somewhat human again.
"mi amore, what's wrong?" Raphael whispers to Simon as he wipes the tears from Simon's cheeks he was unaware were even falling. "I can't lose you Raph, you're everything to me. Now that I'm a daylighter what're we going to do? I can't sit around and pretend to be a vampire, I-I want to go back to uni, I want to pursue music and I want to live again' Simon says, his cheeks getting wetter and wetter as more and more tears fall. 'I love you so much Raphael I can't fucking lose you' Raphael was speechless, all he could do was pull Simon close and hold him tight as Simon's body shook, Raphael's shoulder muffling Simon's sobs as Raphael hid his own from his lover. He needed to be strong.
It had been a few days since the incident on the rooftop of DuMort, Simon and Raphael hadn't spoken much, only texting when they can. The sleeping arrangements didn't help at all. Simon would stay up as late as he could, meaning he was exhausted the next day at his part time job or was too tired to go to band practice. Raphael being the clan leader didn't help at all as Raphael had many early morning (evening for Simon) business meetings to attend meaning he was busy most of the time Simon was trying to keep his eyes open.
Raphael had finally mustered up the courage to go see Magnus to see if there was anything that they could do for Simon and Raphael be together. 'Please Mags, there has to be something' Raphael pleads walking after Magnus who was walking out onto the balcony 'you could always get Jace to let you drink his blood much like Simon did, see if you become a daylighter' Magnus tries to joke. 'Magnus Bane stop treating this as a joke! I love Simon and I want us to be together the least you could do is try and help us or at least listen to me! You're like my older brother you're the one person I trust with this' Raphae spurts out whisper a weak 'please try and help us'. Magnus sighs deeply before saying
'there isn't anything you can do Raph, I'm sorry. I know you love Simon and it breaks my heart to see you - someone I love so much myself - have to go through this. I could never imagine having to go through this with Alec so I can only begin to imagine how you must feel. The only way you and Simon can be together again is if you turn Simon back into a vampire' Raphael sighs, his last hope crushing down before him. He could never ask Simon to become a vampire again.
