Roommates

Chapter 19

Ryder//

I decided to use a subtle approach. I didn't want to shock him more than he seemed to already be.

I sat next to him. He didn't seem to notice me. I didn't say anything at first. I just bathed in the comfortable silence that lingered between us, accompanied by the occasional whiffs of cold air.

Spencer had three bus tickets in his hand, but he was staring in front of him, at a specific part of the street that didn't seem to be of any significance to me.

I put my hand on his shoulder hesitantly. "Hey" I spoke softly.

He turned to face me, his face as gloomy as today's sky. The blue of his eyes was faded into a bluish grey.

"What's wrong?" I tried again "you had me worried about you" he didn't answer. He looked down at the the white bus tickets, and suddenly a single tear fell and landed on the top one.

"Let's get you home?" I asked which he also didn't answer. I stood up, took his empty hand and lifted him up, which thankfully he didn't disobey.

When we started walking he didn't let go of my hand so I did it myself. However, he squeezed it which made me not bother try letting go of it anymore.

We didn't talk. We just walked, hand in hand, back to the apartment.

When we eventually got there, I opened the door with my keys and let him in.

I was starting to grow impatient and more worried. He wasn't speaking a word, and as much I was feeling relieved that he's here and safe with me, it still worried me.

He threw the bus tickets in the bowl I keep my keys and stuff in on the coffee table, while I went to the coat rack to hang my jacket.

The apartment is always warmer than the outside. And I mean unbearably warm that sometimes you think it's spring or summer when it's hella winter.

When I turned around, Spencer wasn't there. I looked right and left but couldn't see him anywhere.

Then I heard a sniffle from behind the couch.

I went around and found him sitting on the floor behind the couch, his back to its back. His forehead was resting on his folded arms which were sat on his folded knees.

I sat in front of him. "Spencer you need to tell me what's wrong or else I can't help you"

"Why do you wanna help me?" what kind of stupid question was that?

"Of course I wanna help you because I care about you"

"You didn't even remember it" he sighed. "I knew you wouldn't but I still had hope" remember what? What was he talking about?

He's been talking about me remembering something for weeks, but I didn't know what was it and he wouldn't tell me.

"Okay I'm sorry I didn't remember whatever it is that I should. Is that what's upsetting you?"

"I fucking loved her so much" he cried and shook. Loved her? Loved who?

"Okay who is she?"

"She was with someone else" he said but I didn't understand because his head was still in his arms. "It broke my heart to lose her even though she wasn't mine"

Oh so it was about a girl.

"Can you be more specific?" I asked but he didn't say anything. I decided to give him some space and went to make us something to eat.

I didn't realise how much of a good distraction cooking was. It really helps get your mind off things and you end up with food. It's a win-win.

I somehow felt a presence behind me, and when I checked it was Spencer in the doorway. He was wearing my t-shirt and his pajama bottoms, but I didn't think he was aware that it's my t-shirt not his. I swear to God that guy can't stand staying a straight hour in jeans.