The Beta and His Angel (The Belesone Pack #3)

Chapter 24

Jackson had been given the task of helping Algar oversee the settlement of Carlton's pack. It was strange having so many new shifters on their land, but he was actually enjoying getting to know them. Their wolves were so different, but so like Katarina, that most of the Belesone pack were realizing how badly they had treated her, for something that wasn't her fault.

No one had ever known that she was of a different lineage, from a different part of the world. No one had realized that, for her people, she was rather special. He presumed that was why he had been given the prestigious position. He had once appreciated Katarina more than the others of their pack and Milo hadn't forgotten that.

Jackson hadn't forgotten being growled at by his Alpha in the cafeteria either. It had been one terrifying experience and then he'd gone on to discover that the girl he had been flirting with was the Alpha's true mate. That had shocked him. But no more than Milo's apology for 'overreacting'. Frankly, he was the Alpha, he could react however he liked, so Jackson didn't hold a grudge.

"Why are you staring at her?" Algar asked suddenly, snapping him out of his thoughts. He didn't have a clue what he was talking about, so he shook his head with a bewildered look and lifted the nearest fallen tree over his shoulder with no effort at all.

"I'm not staring at anyone, Algar. Really, I haven't got a clue what you're talking about," he shrugged off the six foot tree and let it roll down the hill, where the rest of the felled trees lay. They were gathering them in one area so they could be used to build Leo and Angel's cabin, rather than let them go to waste.

"Jackson...I want you in my guard, but if you can't focus your attention then there's no point," he sighed, grabbing one tree under each arm and carrying them back to the pit of chopped trees.

"I was just thinking about the Alpha," he admitted, casually. "About how he once just about bit my head off for flirting with his mate. I didn't know they were true mates when I did it, of course," he excused his lack of concentration as nothing important. If he was honest, he was just re-evaluating his life, that was all.

"Do you have a mate, Jackson?" Algar wondered.

Jackson smiled faintly and straightened up, empty handed. He ran the back of his hand over his forehead, wondering how to phrase what needed said and finally decided to just bite the bullet. "Yes and no," he replied honestly. "I know who my mate is, but I'll never tell her," he shrugged it off.

"Because you want to join the guard and our life is too dangerous?" he asked, curiously.

"No," Jackson laughed as he faced off the Captain of the guard. The Captain who, similarly, had refused his true mate because of the horrible things she had done during her life. Josanna was being punished and no one knew whether Algar would ever agree to unite with her. What she had done was unthinkable to most shifters, especially those who felt the mate bond. "Algar, I'm choosing to refuse my mate because I can't trust her," he explained finally.

"Bricia," he guessed, making Jackson nod with an unhappy smile.

"I've never known a girl to act the way they did. I can honestly say that I understand Janet's actions. Her parents were struggling with their finances and they were too ashamed to ask the Alpha for help," Jackson admitted everything he was feeling lately. It was hard to pinpoint one exact reason for his decision to refuse Bricia, because there were far too many to count.

"She thought that if she had a mate, she could leave home and her parents wouldn't have to pay for her any more. I get that and I think Callum does too. He still finds it hard to accept that she never went looking for him, but he understands that she did wrong selflessly. She didn't want a rich or powerful mate, just someone who could take the burden from her family," he nodded to himself in understanding.

"But Josanna?" he said, shaking his head. "I'm not sure what you're going through Algar, but feeling the mate bond and choosing to refuse my mate is tearing me up inside. Every time I look at Bricia, I feel as I'm having hot spikes driven through my heart," Jackson confessed, unsurprised to see that Algar's eyes held a look of recognition. He felt it too. But, surprisingly, his gaze drifted off to Josanna and he saw a love there that he didn't understand.

"But at the same time, I know that she's selfish, unkind, spoiled and all she cares about is money and power. Though she really has none of her own. I don't want that in a mate. So I'm thinking about finding someone else to unite with," he sighed, glad to have someone to talk to, who understood what he was going through.

"No," Algar protested.

"Why not?"

"Jackson, you have felt this bond for how long?" he wondered.

"Just the last few days, since I've been around her more often. But it's intense Algar. It's real."

Jackson didn't want to have to hear that just because it had only been a few days, what he felt wasn't real or meaningful. Besides, he didn't want to admit to the jealousy he felt, knowing that his true mate had kissed his pack's Beta, Leo. Who was off on a search for his own mate, who was a guy. It was all just far too complicated for him to comprehend.

"I know that. The mate bond doesn't care about length of time. But I will tell you that the ache, the gut-wrenching pain you feel when you look at her only increases with time," Algar apologized for being the one to break the bad news. "The more I refuse Josanna, the more pain I'm in. And yet she walks this place with her head held high and no emotion at all. She doesn't feel our bond, but I feel it twice fold. Do not do this," he begged.

"If you take a mate that is not your true mate, you are taking away their chance at happiness. But not only that, you will suffer greatly. I have spoken with Alpha Carlton on this and there is no way to stop the pain without your mate by your side. Only a union with them will make you whole," Algar explained, having shamelessly gone to Carlton to ask if there was a way to spell away his true mate bond. But no such thing existed.

"So even if I took another mate, I'd still feel this way?" Jackson asked, deflated that his brilliant plan wouldn't only fail but backfire.

"Worse," Algar sighed and placed a comforting hand on his friend's shoulder. "The false union would eat away at your soul. You may risk harming your wife or betraying her with your true mate. You don't want to do that, Jackson," he explained the worst part.

"No. No, I really don't," Jackson agreed that he never wanted to hurt anyone, especially out of his own selfish desire not to unite with someone who caused him pain. But there was little choice in their world. It was true mate or no mate, really. "Then what do I do?" he wondered.

"Join with me in the guard and we will fight this demon together," Algar smiled reassuringly.

"I don't think my feelings are the demon, Algar," he chucked at the thought of demons. There was no such thing in their world, but it was an interesting thought. "I think Bricia is. All I'm feeling are the torture pangs of her indifference to me," he confessed heavily.

Algar laughed and gave him a nudge. "You are so dramatic," he teased.

Jackson could only nod his agreement. He really was.