" In a way I think she is a star.
She burns bright but at first she's faraway,
just out of reach until one day she hurtles into your life,
breath taking and beautiful,
full of secrets and mystery hoping that you'll catch her,
but if you blink,
yo...
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-Stella Hart-
I'm losing time.
No, not losing. Missing. Missing time.
You know that feeling you get when you realised how much time has past, or how close it is until exams, or how you're 16 in a handful of weeks and you freak out?
Fucking hell, I'm freaking out. Time is slipping through my fingers like water and I'm missing it. I miss the time I had before the Tri-Wizard Tournament, I miss the time I had before I kissed Sirius Black, and I miss the time I had, however fleeting, before my mother forbade me from ever kissing him again.
I miss it. Time. I never have before, but this year, I do.
"Use the sleeves of my sweater Let's have an adventure Head in the clouds but my gravity's centered Touch my neck and I'll touch yours You in those little high waisted shorts, oh"
"Where the fuck do you find these songs?"
Remus and I had ditched Muggle Studdies and skived off around the back of the castle near Hagrid's Hut. We were leaning against one of the old oak trees, listening to one of my tapes in Remus' mini record player (he called it a walkman) that had a little cord attached to the side that split off into two cords with a little bud on each end that perfectly fit in each of our ears and poured music out of it. Muggle stuff was so weird.
"I don't know." I replied, smiling coyly and pulling a packet of Marlboro lights out of my skirt pocket. I offered him one and he took two. I snorted before pulling one out for myself. I took off my robes, and just kept my sweater on over my shirt so that my robes wouldn't absorb any of the smell. McGonogal is like a bloodhound. She can smell a ciggarette from a mile away.
Instead of pulling out a lighter or even using my wand, I merely touched the end of the ciggarette and when I pulled my hand away, it was lit. Remus' eyes went wide as I leaned across and did the same to his.
"Melin, Stell! You can do wandless magic?" He exclaimed and I rolled my eyes.
"I can light a ciggarette without my wand. That's hardly one for the books."
I raised it to my lips and took a long, deep drag, that last year would have sent me into a coughing fit, but fifth year was doing me proud. I barely flinched.
"So," I said, blowing the smoke away from Remus, "what secrets are you keeping?" I asked him and his lips lifted into a wan smile.
"No scerets."
I scoffed, flicking ash at him.
"Liar." I accused and he blew a stream of smoke at me and I squealed.
"Not in my hair! It will never come out and McGonogal will have my ass on a plate." I whined and Remus laughed. A moment passed and I knew I was going to have to do some genuine digging.
