Psycho

Day 19

Today, I sat patiently on my bed and waited for Dr. Perkins. I was anxious for today's session for many reasons. After seeing Jason and facing the truth, I refused to see anyone and I knew that was gonna come up. I also didn't want to talk about Jason after that night, afraid I would breakdown. I had to hide it for both my sake, and Jason's. He may not love me but that doesn't mean I suddenly don't love him.

"Hello, Katie," Dr. Perkins grinned as he entered. "How are we feeling today?"

"Good," I let out a breath.

"Better than yesterday?" he double checked, and I just nodded this time. He sat in the chair across from me. "We'll start out simple today. Describe your living conditions at Mr. McCann's quarters."

I gulped, of course the first thing would be about Jason. I didn't show it bothered me though. "It was great, it was just like a regular house...well, mansion. There were a lot of different rooms, and my room in particular was huge! A queen bed, full size dresser, two nightstands, even my own bathroom!" I described,actually finding this quite easy to answer. I liked that room the second I saw it, my issue was when I couldn't go anywhere else.

Dr. Perkins raised an eyebrow at me. "Wow, that sounds...nice! Seems like he was prepared to have you there," he trailed off, and I knew what he was hinting at.

I rolled my eyes. "Almost every room in Jason's house was full. He let's a lot of gang members and staff sleep there," I elaborated, because it wasn't all that odd that Jason had a room already prepared.

"He told you that?"

"Yes."

"Did he tell a lot of things?"

"We...spoke a lot..." I trailed off, not knowing what he wanted me to say.

"About what? His business at all?"

I furrowed my eyebrows. "Not much...how is this relevant?"

"I'm trying to figure out how much Mr. McCann trusted you. Did he give you information on different things about the house or his life?"

I eyed him suspiciously, unsure what this had to do with me and my recovery. "That would make sense if you were treating Jason...but you're treating me," I ignored his question.

"We already know that you trusted him, this is so you figure out how little he trusted you."

"How little?" I questioned.

"Excuse me, how much," he corrected himself.

I stared at him, a million things running through my head. Then I thought back to when Jason and I talked about trust. We had multiple conversations about trusting each other, and we were always honest about it. "I already know."

"You do?" Dr. Perkins was caught off guard. "Well...I don't suppose you have any information then."

I shook my head, knowing what was going on. "I don't suppose you want to help me, but rather my help at finding Jason," I stood up.

"That's not at all it..."

"I think our session for today is over," I cut him off.

"The sessions just started..."

"Goodbye," I pointed to the door.

Dr. Perkins finally gave a nod, standing up and making his way to the door. "If you want to talk later, notify a nurse," he said, then exiting.

I sighed as the door shut, sliding down the wall and sitting on the floor. I actually wanted to get help, to deal with everything I've been holding in all my life, and I couldn't even get it in a mental hospital. What was the point in me being here if no one would actually help me?

As I stared ahead of me, something caught my eye. It was bright red, standing out as everything else was white. I furrowed my eyebrows, standing up and walking to the desk it was on. It was a ball. I picked it up; a stress ball in particular. Why was this in here?

My jaw instinctively dropped, realizing where it came from. A sudden surge of anger rose and I threw it at the wall. How did he do that? Did he just hang on to it? Why would he...he holds onto the ball to calm him...he really does try...

I walked over to the ball, picking it up. Did he leave it here because I didn't come with him? Was he done trying? I tossed the ball as I thought, noticing something about the ball. I caught it and then turned it over until I found the black I spotted. It was a phone number, a way to reach him. That explains why it's here.

I let out a deep breath, staring at the ball. My million of thoughts tripled to say the least.