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She didn't want love.

She wanted to be loved.

And that was entirely different.

***

"He's been stable," Doctor Germain doesn't look up from his chart as I walk in. His attention changes though when he sees Mark.

"Mark," he smiles and pats him on the back. The golden boy. "Glad to see you're here."

He leads us down the hall, showing us where father is. Resting on the bed, sleeping.

"We've been doing daily rounds of antibiotics," Doctor Germain says, looking at Mark.

Mark nods, "Thanks Doctor."

Doctor Germain gives another reassuring pat on Mark's back before walking away.

We sit down, each on either side of dad.

I look up and see Mark staring at me.

"What?"

He shakes his head, "Lex...how are you feeling?"

I look down at dad, "I don't think it's contagious. I mean I'm not sick and-,"

"No Lex," Mark shakes his head, frustrated, "I meant about finding your mate."

I pause, looking into Mark's honey brown eyes. My thoughts wander back to another set of eyes. A set of dark blue ones.

"I'm...fine."

Mark runs his hands through his hair, sighing and pressing his palms into his eyes- frustrated.

"Out of all the wolves....it had to be him."

"What do you mean...?" I'm nervous now.

"Lex the guy is...," Mark looks up. Something in my face must have tipped him off to how scared I was in that moment. To how his words affected me.

He stands, making his way around the bed to me, and wraps his arms securely to hold me in place as I start to shake.

"Shhh, Lex it's okay. You don't have to go with him if you don't want to."

Lie.

It's a lie.

I can smell it from him. Smell the way he is sweating and see how his eyes close at the pain it's causing him to tell it.

Lie.

Because we both know I have no choice in the matter.

I'm an Alpha's mate.

And an Alpha needs his Luna.

"It's okay Mark," I whisper, "I'm okay."

"It's just....," Mark looks down at me. I nod, "I can take it. Tell me."

He lets out a deep breath of air, pent up tension releasing as he continues, "He's so angry Lex. All the time. He just...He's messed up. I don't know if he will hurt you. I don't know if he will take care of you the way you should be taken care of."

Fragile.

I can see now in Mark's eyes how fragile he thinks I am.

Maybe it's true.

Maybe I really am breakable.

Like a shard of ice upon the lake. One wrong step and I crack.

"I'm...I'm messed up also," I whisper the word but it has Mark glaring down at me.

"We've been over this Lexie. You are not messed up. You are good. Whole."

I nod, but inside I feel my chest weaken. Feel my throat close up from the tears I want to spill.

Whole.

Maybe.

At one time I was.

But I don't think so anymore.

Someone long ago stepped upon me- ventured upon the ice within the lake.

They made the wrong step.

And it shattered.

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