Kissing Men (BoyxBoy | Mature)

Chapter Thirty-Five

I stroked over Jay's back slowly as I watched him. I wanted him to know I was here for him. 

"He... When I was young... It started when I was about 8... He used to come into my room at night and he'd do things to me... Touch me..." he said quietly, his body trembling a little. 

"It's okay," I whispered. My lips ghosted over his skin to try and calm him down. "Don't worry, it's okay."

"When I was about 10... He..." He took a shaky breath. "He raped me... My mum went away on business for a few weeks and he r-raped me..."

It was kind of what I'd been expecting but it still hurt, unbelievably so, to hear him say it. I tightened my arms around him. 

"What happened?" I asked gently. 

"When Mummy got back... She found out and she didn't care... She just... let him... She didn't stop him," he whispered against my neck. 

"Jay..." I started, trying to let him know he didn't need to continue but he didn't seem to notice and just kept going. 

"And he would rape me, over and over again, until I was bleeding so much I was hospitalised for two weeks..."

He was crying now, sobbing into my neck. I held him closer, stroking his back and hair. 

"Sometimes I have n-nightmares that he's been released and h-he's going to come after me..."

For the first time I could hear fear in his voice. His hands were trembling as he held me against the wall. I managed to get down so my feet were on the floor. I let him keep his arms wrapped tightly around my chest as I reached for a bottle of shampoo. 

I squirted some into my hand and massaged it into his scalp. He looked up at me through teary eyes. 

"Close those beautiful eyes," I said quietly and kissed his nose. 

He closed them immediately and just let me wash his hair. When I was finished with that, I grabbed the only sponge on a small shelf and squirted some body wash onto it, rubbing it over his skin gently. 

He sniffed. He seemed to be calming down. When I was finished, he was watching me quietly. 

"Now for the inside," I murmured, smiling as I leant up and kissed him softly. 

He hesitated before kissing back, pulling me close against him again. We kept kissing as he washed my hair too and then just put some body wash into his hands so he could touch me while he cleaned me. 

"Jay..." I whispered as I pulled away a little. 

"I'm sorry for being such a baby about it," he murmured, not meeting my eyes. 

I just stared at him in silent surprise for so long that he slowly dragged his eyes up to meet mine. I smacked his cheek oh-so-gently. 

"Don't be silly, Jay," I scolded quietly. "You're not a baby at all. And if you are, you're my baby."

I suddenly realised what I'd said and the romantic meaning behind it. Just as I was about to open my mouth to take it back, a small smile graced his lips and he pulled me against him again. 

"The lube's all gone by the way," he muttered. 

I smiled and hugged him back. "Thank you."

"Don't worry." All was quiet for a little while. "Thank you...."

"What for?" I asked, a little confused. 

"Being so... you. Understanding."

"Can I ask a question?" I said hesitantly. He just nodded. "Why did Corey call you Jaimie?"

He sighed a little. "My name isn't really Jay... It's just a nickname I used to have... Jaimie is my real name... It's what... he used to call me so I changed it."

I was quiet for a few moments, taking it in. "Well, you're just Jay to me. I have to admit, it's much sexier too."

His smile widened, as I'd intended. He turned the shower off and scooped me up into his arms suddenly, making me yelp in surprise. I wrapped my arms around his neck as he cradled my body close to his and carried me back through to the bedroom.

"Are you hungry?" he asked as he set me down on the bed.

"A little."

I glanced at the clock, surprised to see it was past 5. Jesus, what had we been doing that took so much time! We couldn't have been in the shower that long...

"I want takeout," he said quietly, getting a few menus out of a drawer. 

He came back and handed me one. I wrapped myself in the duvet like a caterpillar and looked over it. Jay sat on the bed - duvet-less - with his legs crossed, utterly silent as he pored over it. 

"Will you pick for me? I don't know what most of this is," I admitted, blushing a  little. 

He smiled and reached over to grab his mobile, tapping in the number on the menus and spoke to the person on the other end, ordering chicken chow mein and king prawn fried rice. 

I looked up at him, thinking, as he did. 

He really was amazing...

(A/N Hope this chapter wasn't too crappy :/ Not happy with it really but not sure why. Let me know what you think. Majority said this length and regular so I'll stick to how I do it now :) Chapter dedicated to Lex_The_Loner for making me laugh >.< ~Beka)