His Lover, My Mate

Forty: Feed

^This is just the first part of what the Toy Box Killer made his victims hear before he sexually assaulted  them (and killed them after months of torture). It is disgusting and it evokes some strong emotions. Aletha was told something very similar by her captor, and it is scary. She was only 13 so can you imagine what it felt like?

Anyway, here she will talk to Rush about some of her feelings and why Fiona's presence itself causes her so much distress. The word "WHORE" is terrifying for her because of her captive days. 

BEWARE, there is some very graphic and disturbing language in here!

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*Aletha*

There was an odd chill on her body, like she was bathed in winter instead of the early hues of summertime. Her blood was rushing languidly, but as strange as it was, she could feel it move. She felt the path they took, the channels that served as her veins. All over her arms and legs. And then there was a tightening around her neck, and it dried her mouth. It was a slow burn, something that didn't alarm you until it was suddenly right in front of your face.

It didn't hurt anymore. The sudden assault of Fiona's claws, the excruciating pain as her vessels burst and muscles tore...the pain no longer lingered. Just the strange tightening around her throat, squeezing her and forcing her to breathe harsher.

She could remember how suddenly those claws had come to her neck. Fiona had given her no time to ready herself. She just lashed out with a crazed look to her eyes, wanting her mate all to herself. She'd never seen such hate before. Whore, she'd called her.

What a whore.

Aletha didn't want to admit it to herself, but she knew what that word did to her. It made her freeze up, feel all the things she never wanted to feel again. The blades, the burns, the whips, the teeth...the disgusting flesh and the release after they were done violating her body. The spit and the urine and the derogatory laughs as they watched her break over and over again.

And they'd always made sure that she remembered she was a whore.

Suddenly, she was back in that cell again. Back to her endless nightmares, with her shackled to the wall in thick, painful chains. And this time, it wasn't just any ordinary night she'd spent with those rogues. It was her first night they'd abducted her.

She'd been so disoriented, just looking around helplessly in the night and wondering why she was trapped. Her whole body had been throbbing in pain, because she'd never used her wolf for so long before. She'd probably run hundreds of miles that night to get away from the Ironlands. And now she was spread open, completely naked, and panicking as each second ticked away.

She heard his voice before she saw his face, a terrible distortion in the darkness. "Do you know why you're here, bitch?"

And then he'd stepped closer and she'd screamed.

She'd seen evil, but she'd never known the depravity she was about to experience. And the poor little girl she was, she'd taken all of it. All of his depravity and his evil. And what went on for several months never stopped terrifying her. It never stopped haunting her. It would always be a part of her, a nasty, ugly part of her that made her heart twist with darkness. She wanted to make them feel every drop of humiliation and pain that they made her feel. She wanted them to burn again and again. She felt the claws of vengeance clenching around her, injecting thoughts she knew would corrupt her. But the seeds of the night had been planted in her since her abduction, and she knew she would never be the same.

She didn't want to be a failure as she'd been with the rogues. She never wanted to be in that situation again, feeling powerless and lost. She'd felt that way when Rush first brought her to his pack, and she'd just snapped at him, thinking the worst. She could only feel what her captors had done to her. She felt that helplessness then, and it made her feel like she was really made for men's captivity. She felt like a whore, and she hated herself for it.