CALLA : BOOK II

20 - I Can't

       

                In the corner office of Allac's Headquarter, standing by the curtain wall, my eyes focused on the city skyline. It was a gray day. The rain drizzled down lightly onto the city. I'm staring up at the cloudless sky, pondering where if I should skip class.

"I heard you went on a date with Eli Frye"

                I didn't bother to turn around, knowing Alexander Locke is standing at the doorway with a grin on his face.

"How did it go?" He asked with an amusement tone.

"He said he like me" I turned around and leaned against the curtain wall horizontal mullion.

"And?" Alex gave a knowing smile.

"And I rejected him"

                Alex crossed the office and sat casually on the end of my desk with his hands holding onto the edge of the counter.

"Why did you reject him if you're going to mope?" Alex chuckled.

                I didn't respond to his question.

"Calla, you're always so nervous about that man. Where is the confident, cocky Calla I know?"

                I turned to face Alex, feeling indignant.

"I'm not cocky" I said with pursed lips.

"Oh right, I meant miss know-it-all"

"You_"

"Come here brat"

                Alex laughed softly while he opened his arms out for me. I gave a soft sigh before walking into his opened arms. The last time Alex hugged me was on my seventeen birthday. We were working late into the night when he found out it was my birthday. The man was shocked that I didn't spend my birthday with my family and friends. When I told him it was "just another day", the man hit my head before hugging me. The very next day, he gave me a hundred multicolor calla lilies.

"If you like him so much, why do you fight tirelessly with yourself to deny him?" Alex said gently. "Just take what you want"

                He was right to say I'm fighting tirelessly with myself. Leaning my cheek against Alex's strong chest, I closed my eyes.

"I can't..."

"Why can't you?"

"I don't want to be the old Calla" Behind my close eyes, I could see memories of my old self. "I tried so hard to escape that shadow... I can't go back"

                I was speaking in riddles, but Alex didn't question it. He only held me soothingly.

"What shadow? Stupid girl, don't you know you're the light?"

                I smiled at the pretty man's pretty words. Lifting my head, I looked up at my right hand man - my CEO - my confidant.

"Why can't I love someone like you?"

"I'm not masculine enough for you, remember?" He smirked at me.

                I couldn't stop the laughter that bubbled out of me.

"You're plenty masculine, Alex" I gave a teasing smile. "So manly that all your admirers are captivated"

                One his eyebrow arched up.

"So" I continued to tease. "Any of them catch your interest?"

"Not my type"

"Ohhhh" I smiled wide. "You have a type"

                Again, he smirked at me.

"Tell me Mr. Locke, what is your type?"

"Responsible, hardworking, non-lazy, and non-brat"

                I laughed against his chest.

"How mean, I don't have a chance at all"

"So you are aware of your flaws" He taunted.

                Feeling better, I stepped out of his arms and smile up at him.

"Calla" Alex suddenly placed a gentle hand on top of my head. "Don't push yourself too much. You're only 19..."

                Alexander Locke may not be the man my heart yearns for, but he is someone my heart completely trusts.