Twenty Two

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I took off my clothes and stepped into the warm shower. As I washed, I thought of how I'd tell Nikolai. I had to tell him, about the baby.

The grief suddenly struck me and tears rolled down my cheeks as I stood unerneath the warm water.

I covered my hand with my mouth, leaning into the tiled wall so Nikolai wouldn't hear me.

I silently cried in the shower, unable to move. I tried to calm myself down so I could finish washing and go talk to Nikolai but it seemed impossible.

Finally I was able to calm myself down and I quickly finished washing before stepping out of the shower.

I got into my pj's and began to brush my teeth over and over. Nikolai opened the bathroom door and walked in.

I rinsed my mouth and toothbrush then turned towards him, getting ready to speak.

He stared down at my bloody clothes. I picked them up and put them in the trash before grabbing his hands and taking a deep breath.

"I have to tell you something."
I whispered. He nodded and led me to the bed. We sat down and I stared at my lap, gripping his hands.

"I lost the baby, today. Before you came. He beat it out of me. I'm so sorry Nikolai."
I whispered then began crying. Nikolai held me close while a maid walked in with a food tray for me.

She quickly set it down then left while Nikolai tightened his grip around me.
"It's not your fault Emma, it's mine. And I'm so sorry we didn't come sooner. I'm so sorry."
He choked out and I realized he was crying also.

I hugged him tighter, sobbing and he silently cried, stroking my wet hair and trying to comfort me.

"It's not your fault either. Ian is the only one to blame."
I whispered to Nikolai, trying to calm myself and he slightly nodded, calming himself down.

He calmed me down then helped me eat. Afterwards he tucked me into bed and held me until I fell asleep.

•*•*•*•

One week later

Things had became, a bit better. Nikolai seemed distant since the loss of our child, but I knew it was a part of the grieving process.

I've slowly began to grow back into normal routine or whatever. I still had nightmares, but Nikolai always comforted me.

I yawned and woke up and glanced at Nikolai. He had left at some point really early this morning.

There was a hickey on his neck, his lips were red and swollen and he had smeared lipstick on his face. He smelled of alcohol, strongly.

I glared at him and he gave me a small smile, waking up.
"Emma-"
"Do you think this is a joke?! I was kidnapped and as soon as I get back you cheat!"
I screamed at him.

"How are we supposed to have kids?! You can't have them anymore!"
He shouted and I flinched. He was drunk still.

"I can still have kids you bastard! But obviously you don't care! Maybe you should just stay with your dumb whores because I'm done trying to tame the dumb fucking jerk!"
I shouted, tears rolling down my face and tossed my wedding rings at him.

"I can't stand this anymore Nikolai. The cheating, the constant apologizing. It hurts too much now. I can't handle it."
I whispered and he stared at me.

"We don't work. We're not meant for each other, we might as well face the facts and accept it. We tried to make it work, but we couldn't, we can't."
I added quietly, the tears falling down my cheeks faster.

I felt, a relief, admitting it outloud. I never really knew I felt that way until now.

We stared at each other before he turned away and left the room, slamming the door behind him.

I tried to calm myself as I grabbed a suit case and began shoving my clothes into it.

I began grabbing essentials and everything I needed to escape, escape from the mafia life. I was done with it.

I was leaving. Once more, but this time I'd be more careful.

I cleaned myself up then bought an airplane ticket online quickly. Maybe I was being crazy, but I didn't care anymore, I wanted out.

I raced downstairs quickly and outside to one of the cars. I threw my bag into the car then got in and buckled up.

Go to the airport. I'm going to go...
see some friends."
I muttered and the driver began driving. Hopefully he wouldn't notify Nikolai or anyone else.

Cooper ran out of the house after me but it was too late. 

•*•*•*•

I boarded the plane and sat in my spot. As it began to take off, in the distance I could see black cars speeding here.

It was too late. The plan took off and I squeezed my eyes shut. I left to NYC. Where I changed my name and all of my credentials, everything.

I got a fake ID and found an apartment for myself. Over a span of a week I got myself a job, but I knew something was off about my health.

I knew Nikolai would look for me, but for now I would stay hidden in New York.

•*•*•*•

Three weeks later

I glanced at myself in my mirror. My stomach had slightly grown, barely though.

I thought it was from all the stress eating I had been doing, but the shape it was taking made me doubt it.

I was scared of what was going on. I prayed I was wrong, like actaully prayed. How could I have not noticed it before?

I was showing all the symptoms, but it was up to the doctor to decide what was going on.

I just hoped he would give me good news.

•*•*•*•

"Well Miss. Vanessa, you seem to be pregnant. You're currently nine to ten weeks pregnant. It seemed you were pregnant with twins, but one miscarried."
The doctor explained and I froze.

I was going to have Nikolai's baby. I left with his child, I was still pregnant. I hadn't lost my child after all, but that created a new threat. If Nikolai found me, I'd be a dead person.

THE END

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