Single Father • Namjoon + BTS!Kids

xxxviii.

Hobi stared at the front of his school. Then he turned around to stare at the familiar car pulling away out of the parking lot, small hands in the window waving at him.

The he turned back to stare at the front of the school.

He wasn't sure when school had stopped being "fun" or when he'd stopped wanting to get out of the car or when he'd started dreading walking into his classroom.

It wasn't like the kids were mean to him.

They just...

Hobi didn't know how to describe it. He'd try so hard for their attention. He craved it. He wanted to be liked.

He wanted to be noticed.

But was that so wrong?

He always walked in with the same mantra going through his head. I won't share my lunch today. I'm going to be strong. I'm going to eat it for myself.

But then the morning classes always went by in a long tortuous descent of never being noticed, of just being that kid with the long face, and when lunch time rolled around, he didn't care so much as to why they paid attention to him. He was just happy to have it.

Even if it was only for the duration of time necessary to take his pretzels and his sandwich and his juice box.

***

"We have a new student today, class," introduced the teacher after all the students had taken their seats.

Hobi was in the middle, but he didn't feel included.

He felt isolated.

"Please introduce yourself."

"H-hi, I'm Wonpil," the small child introduced, raising his right hand and giving a small wave as he squirmed in front of the class, unhappy to be the center of everyone's attention. "It's nice to meet you all. I hope we can be friends."

Everybody ooh'ed and aah'ed over the pretty boy addition to the class.

Hobi smiled with everyone else.

He was happy.

He wants to be friends with us.

That means he wants to be friends with me, right?

***

It turned out that everyone wanted to be friends with Wonpil. Wonpil was all too happy to oblige, smiling and talking with everyone. Hobi wanted Wonpil to smile at him too, but everyone else was surrounding him.

That's okay. I don't want to be rude and try to keep him all for myself. I'm sure he wants to be friends with everyone. I can't be selfish. That would be mean. I can share Wonpil.

But you can't share something you don't have, and for the entire class period, Hobi found himself anxious to introduce himself to the newcomer, but he never got the chance.

Wonpil was always busy with someone else.

Why can't it be me for once? Hobi wondered before swallowing and shaking his head. That sounds selfish. I don't want to be selfish.

I just want to be noticed.

Lunch came and, miracle of miracles, Wonpil somehow ended up seated next to Hobi.

Hobi swallowed. It's now. Now is the time. I can do this. I can be brave. "Hi, I'm-"

"Hey, Wonpil!" one of the boys from Hobi's class said, and he moved to sit next to Wonpil, but that was where Hobi was sitting. "Hey, I'm sorry..." He paused, trying to remember Hobi's name.