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Sometimes Yoongi would leave Yeji alone at home over night.
He told her to pray the night that the sun would raise again, because it was his way of telling her that he might die, knowing the high violence potential around the area they lived.
He was trying to give her the trust before sleep that tomorrow would be different.
And maybe it was his messy handwriting that seemed to still be the same on the note, that had made her feel at least a little comfort when she laid in their empty bed, while he was busy visiting the darkest corners, to follow the other thing that was pulling at his heart. He wrote all those words down in the mornings when she interwined her eyes with him and he let it all out in those nights, when he tried to maybe touch someone the way she did to him.
She made him trying to be the best only for her and he hoped she didn't know about this side of him.
He looked over those that pathetic people that were sniffing on stuff to have a high in their life and he never kept the eyecontact to that one anorexic girl that he kept meeting on his way back home.
He would never notice that she had the same eyes at Yeji.
He never paid attention to those who shop lifted while he was busy getting some groceries at 5 am, because in the end the only thing he could think of was her.
Yeji was in his head all the time.
He could skip a meal as long as he made sure she had something to eat. It didn't matter if he would sleep less, as long as he could make sure she was save at night, or hold her hand when she was crying.
Sometimes they got drunk but Yoongi always made sure to be stable enough to carry her and pull her hair back. Sometimes she seemed heavy to him, but not as heavy as his heart in moments when he didn't know where she was or what she was doing.
She was his hell and heaven, she was his truth and his lie.
Maybe she was the reason why he kept tearing up laetly.
He used to make her feel like she was enough but it got harder.
She kept watering the plants.
He stopped counting the scartches on her hand, he rather put lotion on them when he came back in the mornings and saw her sleeping with her usual so small body placed all over the bed.
It was okay to sleep on the floor, at least she wouldn't be woken up from her dreams.
,,Yoongi..." , she mumbled in the morning and slightly opened her eyes only to catch the male knead her hand softly.
He gave a sound of acknowledge and watched her eyelashes slowly move within her eyelids when she made eyecontact with him.
,,You would've been a great dad."
It made Yoongi's breath stop for a while as he watched her eyes get teary, he dragged her hand up to his mouth and kissed it while she mumbled and apology.
,,Nothing matters Yeji, you're all I need."
She hummed in response and took a deep breath and they remained in silent until she took another breath and looked up to Yoongi who looked at every single feature on her hand precisely.
She knew he was trying his best to cheer her up, but he could never hide his soul from her.
