Padfoot's Weakness - HP / Marauders time travel

25: Contrarium Aevum Tempore

//

1997

//

Sirius took a seat at a long, wooden table placed in a barren room. Around the blank table sat Order of the Phoenix members, along with the Golden Trio. Everyone in the room appeared curious and worried, knowing the topic they would soon discuss.

Dumbledore had summoned them all to the discussion room at Hogwarts, and no one needed an explanation to know what this meeting would be about.

Since Sirius had stepped into the room, he could already feel a headache forming. Mostly at the thought of how many questions Harry would ask.

Beside him sat Remus, who shuffled nervously. Tonks was seated on his right side, and from Sirius' perspective, he could catch the woman reaching for Remus' hand. Almost instantly Remus relaxed, giving a small, discreet smile towards her. Sirius couldn't resist his own smile.

Harry sat with his two friends, all three chatting quietly. Their eyes are full of hope and concern, no doubt excited for Henrietta's return. Molly and Arthur sat with clasped hands, while their children sat silently, waiting for Dumbledore to arrive.

Even Claws sat in the room, curled up in the corner, but her ear-plates were perked up to listen.

Dumbledore abruptly entered the room, face looking worn. He looked older than ever, possibly the consequences of stress. The Headmaster obviously called them for the reason they had all waited for: Henrietta's return.

Dumbledore stood at the head of the table, not bothering to beat around the bush. Before anyone could speak up, he announced, "Henrietta will be returning tomorrow."

Almost instantly people reacted. Looks were exchanged, the Trio sighed in relief, Remus grinned nervously at Tonks, the Weasley's whooped, and Sirius smiled softly. His eyes glimmered with hope.

"She'll appear in the same spot she vanished. Sirius can help tell us where she was," Dumbledore continued. Sirius nodded in agreement.

"Do you know what time she'll get here?" Ron asked.

"Not precisely. We'll possibly be standing there for hours," Dumbledore answered. Ron grumbled in disappointment, and Hermione flicked his forehead. A few people chuckled.

"She'll be okay, right?" Harry asked. "She'll come back safely?"

A pause came from Dumbledore. He almost seemed hesitant... "I hope," he eventually responded. "The counter-spell required Henrietta to have complete focus and control. If she managed, she'll make it through perfectly fine."

Harry bit his lip. This time, it was Molly who spoke up. "And what if she doesn't? What happens if she lost her focus during the counter-spell?" Molly asked quietly.

"I'm not completely sure... I assume she would either be lost in time, or..." His words trailed off, and somehow, the Order got the gist. "Or something more tragic," Dumbledore finished a moment later.

Silence reigned the room, until the Headmaster suddenly stood from his seat.

"When Henrietta returns, I ask of you all to wait for her to be perfectly capable. If she is stunned or in unstable condition, hold back," the elderly wizard added. "That is all for this meeting. We will join again in the Forbidden Forest at one AM. Bring whatever you need to stay comfortable."

The Order members began dispersing, exiting the room and heading to wherever they came from. The Golden Trio reluctantly left, obviously yearning to interrogate Dumbledore. Remus gave Sirius a nod of comprehension when he noticed the man staring at Dumbledore. Claws stood and left the room, after giving a purr to Sirius. Then, everyone was gone, leaving Dumbledore and Sirius alone.

"Dumbledore?" Sirius queried quietly.

"Yes, Sirius?"

"If... If Henrietta returns..." He couldn't seem to finish the sentence.

The Headmaster frowned. "When Henrietta returns. I assume you're concerned for your relationship?" Usually Sirius would have found humor in someone talking to Dumbledore about relationship advice, but now...

"Yes," Sirius answered simply.

"Walk with me," Dumbledore sighed.

The two men left the discussion room, and began strolling down the hallways of Hogwarts. A few stray students wandered, a couple giving negative looks to Sirius. Of course, the raven-haired man couldn't resist wincing.

The older man exhaled. "Sirius, I cannot guarantee that Henrietta and yourself will have a stable relationship. However, after witnessing both of your emotions to her, from now and the past, I know it will be possible with the care you feel for her. Henrietta also cares very strongly about you. She tried to stay in your era, but eventually gave in to return because of the knowledge your older self might be in Azkaban."

Sirius said nothing, continuing to amble alongside Dumbledore.

"If--" He coughed awkwardly. "When, Henrietta returns, would I be able to see her... first, maybe? I just need to know if..." He trails off.

"It depends on how she reacts to returning," the Headmaster responded calmly. "Though I do not doubt you will be the first person she wants to see."

"But Harry--"

"Sirius." Both of them come to a halt. "Henrietta is the love of your life, and you are the love of hers. It is love that kept Harry and Henrietta alive on that fateful Halloween night. I'm sure that your love could keep your relationship alive."

Sirius' eyes glistened over on their own accord. The ex-fugitive wiped at his eyes, blinking back the tears.

"I'll just have to wait and see, I guess," he finally replied.

Dumbledore gave a little hum, and then retreated to his office.

//
1977
//

"Enter."

James and I slowly entered Dumbledore's office, where he sat staring at us. I gulped, closing the door behind us. The Headmaster had obviously been waiting on us, and didn't seem surprised to see I had someone with me.

"Are you ready, Henrietta?" Dumbledore asked. I instantly shook my head. He sighed. "I'm sorry, Henrietta, but remember the consequences. You have affected the timeline heavily, and the future could be in great peril."

"I-I know," I whispered. "But it's just... so hard to say goodbye."

"I understand," Dumbledore murmured kindly. "But do you have your belonging with you? Your wand? Anything you want to keep?"

I did, in fact, have my wand tucked into my boot. I also had a necklace Lily gave me hanging from my neck, so I gave a nod to him.

"Fantastic." He turned to James. "Will you need to be Obliviated?"

"No, sir," James replied quickly. "I don't intend to tell anyone."

Dumbledore nodded, seeming to believe the Gryffindor without a second thought. Then, he returned his attention to me, giving a solemn dip of his head.

"We must begin. Would you like to say final goodbyes?" he asked warmly.

I nodded, swiftly hugging James for the last time. "I'm going to miss you," I muttered.

"Wait, miss me?" James asked with a blink. "Um, I'm still alive in your time, right?"

"Of course!" I lied. "I'll just miss the teenage version of you."

"Ah. I suppose I am pretty cool," he teased.

We pulled away. James pecked my forehead, then turned to Dumbledore. "Please get her back to her time safely," he pleaded.

"I will do as best as I can," Dumbledore vowed.

I stepped away from James, returning my attention to the Headmaster. My anxiety is taking over, making it difficult to breathe. Dumbledore sensed my distress and frowned.

"It will be okay, Henrietta," he reassured me. "I promise myself and you will get you back to your original home." I sighed shakily, then agreed. "Good. Let's begin."

I stood in the clearing of his office, which previously had chairs. The elderly wizard stepped forward, Elder Wand raised.

"Remember, Henrietta," Dumbledore warned. "I will need your help with this spell."

"I know. I need to focus on 1977 Sirius, then switch it to 1997 Sirius."

"Precisely."

He lifted his wand, aiming directly at me. "Are you ready? Check for as many past and future memories you can compare."

I bit my lip, mind racing near-painfully. Flashes of Sirius young and old face took over my vision for a moment. I don't want to leave... I don't want to deal with the stress of Voldemort, or being one of the saviors of the Wizarding World. I don't want to deal with hate from Slytherins, or the drama of my return... And the thought of older Sirius rejecting me makes me feel sick to my stomach.

"Okay, I'm ready."

James slid away to the farthest corner of the office, making sure he was out of our way. Dumbledore prepared himself, clearing his throat and his mind.

And then, a bright light erupted from the Elder Wand as he exclaimed;

"Contrarium Aevum Tempore!"

I gasped as the spell collided with me.

Immediately I was greeted with an excruciating bright burst of white from the blackness behind my eyelids. Then, it was all blank. I could hear Dumbledore's spell repeating over and over, and I realized it was my turn.

Think of Sirius...

I pictured 1977 Sirius, when I first met him.

I stood from my position on the grassy ground, where four familiar boys surrounded me. I had no clue what was going on, until I would discover later. I heard Remus' muffled voice, but Sirius' voice abruptly came through, clearer than ever.

"I don't know... but she's welcome to stay with me until we figure something out," came his flirty remark.

X
Then, I compared it to when I first met older Sirius.
X

"The dog! It's a trap!" Ron exclaimed.

"What?"

"Sirius Black! An Animagus!"

We slowly turned to face the shadowed figure, which had previously been a black dog. In its place stood a man with a striped prisoner outfit, with a thin body from lack of proper diet. His hair was a mess, greasy but also maintaining a handsome black hue. His eyes were an amazing shade of silver, but at the time, I didn't pay much mind to his appearance. I just wanted to stay alive.

X
Next came younger Sirius when we complained about James' constant flirting and neediness towards Lily.
X

"James!" Sirius groaned. "Give it a rest!"

"Hell no!" James snapped. "I'll get her on a date eventually."

I chuckled. Even though I love my parents' back story, James can get aggravating with his constant ranting.

"James, you are obsessed," Sirius sighed.

X
And then older Sirius telling us about James and Lily.
X

"James could never stop chasing Lily," Sirius laughed. Harry and I sat next to Sirius by a scrapbook. He began telling us stories about our parents.

"Was he annoying?" I asked with a chuckle.

"Absolutely."

"Obsessed?"

"Definitely."

X
Another; younger Sirius switching into Padfoot to run around with Prongs.
X

"Alright, how about you guys race in Animagus form?" I suggested with a chuckle.

"Fantastic idea," Sirius agreed in a posh voice.

"Ready?" James asked. Sirius replied with a yes, and next thing I knew, they were animals.

James shifted into Prongs easily, but it was Sirius' transformation that had me staring. The teenager effortlessly molded into a dog, form lessening in height. He shrunk until he was the size of a dog, simultaneously sprouting black fur, claws, a tail, and ears.

"Ready, set, GO!" I counted.

They both took off, darting away as quickly as they could. I couldn't stop a smile at the sight of Padfoot.

X
Older Padfoot.
X

"I wanna be an Animagus some day," I admitted.

Older Sirius and I sat behind 12 Grimmauld Place, both bored and talking idly. The others were either at the Weasley's or off doing Merlin knows what.

"That's good, but don't turn yourself into a mutant," Sirius teased.

"I'll try my best," I chuckled. "Can I see your Animagus form?"

"Sure. If you're light enough you can ride on my back."

"Hell yeah!"

Sirius stood and transformed easily, shrinking in size and changing shapes into the form of a dog. He stood much stronger than when he first escaped Azkaban. Now, he had more muscle and had filled out, since he wasn't starving.

"Cool," I breathed. "Okay, I'm sooo holding you to that offer." I ambled over, climbing onto his shoulders.

I laughed when he tried stepping forward, but could barely move. "Onward, noble steed!" When he failed to keep moving, I laughed and stood away. "You make a horrible horse."

X
His family with younger Sirius...
X

"What about your family?" Remus asked.

The four Marauders, plus me and Lily, sat in the Gryffindor common room, simply talking about our lives. James just finished telling about his family, and now Remus was asking about mine.

"My family is awesome," I chuckled. Well, true. Even though James and Lily aren't alive as my PARENTS, they are alive as my FRIENDS.

Lily turned to Sirius. "What about yours?"

Sirius stiffened. I quickly leaned over and discreetly grasped his hand while he fidgeted uncomfortably. "Well, my family... can't really be called family, to be honest."

Lily frowned. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to ask that if it's personal."

"It's fine. I just hate my family," Sirius chuckled coldly. "My birth family, that is. I love THIS family."

X
Older Sirius talking about his family...
X

"My mother did that, after I ran away," Older Sirius murmured, fingers trailing across a scorched name on the Black family tree.

"Where did you go?" Harry asked.

"At your dad's," Sirius answered without a second thought. "I was always welcomed at the Potter's. My own family... I hated them. Cruel, pureblood obsessed people." He shook his head. "The Potter's were always family to me. And so was your mother, and Remus, and... another."

X
Younger Sirius talking about Azkaban...
X

"Azkaban just... unsettles me," James muttered, shuddering. Lily frowned, cocking her head.

"What's Azkaban?" she asked.

"A wizard prison," Sirius answered. "Darkest, most secure, prison out there. No one's ever escaped." He shuddered, just like James. "Scary place. Don't ever want to go there."

X
Older Sirius talking about Azkaban...
X

"Yeah, You-Know-Who made a big attack on Azkaban," Ron ranted. "He freed lots of Death Eaters."

"Makes sense," Sirius muttered darkly. "Death Eaters getting freed from Azkaban are even worse than those before. Anyone could go insane in a hellhole like Azkaban..."

"So how did you survive?" I asked quietly.

Sirius glanced over, eyes dark and cloudy in thought.

"I don't know," he answered.

X
I started feeling weightless, but also uncomfortable. I felt like I was Apparating, but very, very slowly.
Now, I thought about young Sirius saying goodbye to me...
X

"What am I supposed to do without you?" he asked. Tears were in his eyes, and I began tearing up as well.

"I don't know." I leaned over, taking his hand in mine. "Sirius, I know we're gonna reunite someday, though." And we will.

He didn't reply, instead drawing me into a tight hug. We sat there silently, until he asked, "When are you leaving?"

"I don't know." A huge lie.

X
The strange sensations around me are growing stronger. I can no longer hear anything, except the voice of Sirius from the memories I was thinking of. I was starting to feel lightheaded as well.
Next, I switched it to Older Sirius asking about Renley, just before I went back in time.
X

I was knocked over my Padfoot, who later transformed into Older Sirius. "What the heck are you--" I tried, but he interrupted me.

"How could you?!" he shouted. When I asked what he was doing, he continued. "What's wrong?! What's wrong is that you--you left! We loved you! I loved you! And you... you..."

"Si-Padfoot, what the actual fuck are you talking about?!" I asked.

"You know what I'm talking about, Ren!"

"Who the heck is Ren?"

His face fell. "You... you're not her, are you?"

"Who?"

"Ren... Ren Lane."

X
Comparing younger Sirius to older Sirius.
X

His bright silver eyes are gorgeous, whether he's a teenager or adult. His black hair is wavy as an adult, until the straight and silky appearance as a teenager. He's taller in 1997, with a mental and physical strength stronger than any other. 1976 and 1977 Sirius is not nearly as tough, but he's still got the strong potential.

1997 Sirius stares at me like I am familiar, but he's not sure how. With my brown-black hair, he has no obvious similarities between me and "Renley", except my eyes. I remember him making intense eye contact with me when we talk, as though he's searching for something.

"You remind me of someone," older Sirius mused one time. It was on the same day he showed off his Animagus form to me.

"Really?" I asked. "Who?"

"An old friend," he replied vaguely. "You have her eyes. And the attitude, I'd say."

"I hope that's a good thing," I laughed, both of us completely oblivious to the fact I really AM the person he's comparing me to.

He smiled softly, a gleam of love and adoration in his eyes. A nostalgic expression came to his face.

"It is."

X
I feel like I'm drifting away, but also caught between two choices. Stay in 1977, or return to 1997. The spell is giving me a choice.
What if older Sirius hates me? What if he doesn't want me? What if he does, but doesn't want to stay with me? What if--
No.
No, my Sirius, 1977 and 1997, is MINE. And I am HIS. Whether he wants us together or not, I need him to be safe. He HAS to be safe.
X

An image flashes across my vision, and I have no control over it. I have no clue what it is.

It looks like a scene, of myself and older Sirius. We're outside, on one of the ledges at Hogwarts, and Claws is curled up around us.

"I love you," I feel myself whisper.

A moment of silence passes, and I fear the vision is showing me the truth: older Sirius won't want me.

But then he's turning and murmuring, "I love you." And pulling me into a kiss.

X
I want to go back. I NEED to go back.
I want older Sirius. And he wants me.
X

The series of images, memories, and visions vanish, and I suddenly find myself being blinded by a frenzy of colors. I feel myself being whisked away, yanked through time and back to my home. With Harry, Hermione, Ron, Remus, and Sirius.

I feel the wind. I feel the same sensation of when I was first sent to 1976. I feel sunlight, I feel a breeze, I hear voices.

I slowly open my eyes, finding myself in the Forbidden Forest. I'm in the same spot where I was sent away to the past. I notice people around the area, but I pay no mind to them.

I only pay attention to one person.

There, less than a couple yards away, stands the older Sirius Black. He looks tired and anxious, like he's been worrying however long I've been gone. He looks afraid, like he thinks I won't want him. But his eyes show love, and he looks hopeful.

He isn't the same young Sirius I fell in love with. But he's still mine. And I love him.

"Hello, Henrietta."

//