I'm Just Curious

Chapter Twenty-Three: Surreal

RATED R FOR EXPLICIT SEXUAL CONTENT

xxxxx

He kissed me.

I retracted my hands to rest them on his shoulders and tilted my head to deepen our kiss. Shaun dipped his tongue in to my mouth occasionally, which I accepted while grating it lightly with my teeth. His hands pulled me close to him, his nails practically clawing into my lower back, which made me rock my hips on him. I kissed his lower lip and nibbled on it before pulling away to grind on Shaun. That’s when it hit me.

I paused and looked at Shaun as heat began to emanate off my body. He looked back and smirked, but that just made me feel bad.

“I’m sorry,” I said and I sat up straight on his lap.

My hand moved to cover my mouth as I felt my ears burn. I could only imagine how red I was now. Shaun took my hand and removed it from my mouth, frowning at my change in mood.

“What’s wrong?”

“Uh,” I shifted to move off him but he held me in place by my hand and waist.

“Why’d you stop?”

“I-It’s not like you really want to do this,” I answered in surprise to his response.

“What makes you think that?”

He let go of me and readjusted his position, his back off the couch as he supported himself with his hands on the ground. I moved slightly back to sit on his thighs and rested my hands on his chest.

“L-Last time,” could I tell him this?

Do what you want Fabien.

I smiled and took a deep breath.

“Last time we did this...you didn’t feel a thing. Did you?” I asked.

It hung over me like a grey cloud because I do remember from the beginning Shaun had said it was simple curiosity that made him get with me. I effortlessly got him but I planned on warding him away with ignorance – but he found his way to my heart. And at this moment, he’ll find his way out. I looked away from him and waited for any excuse he could give me that would make this less hurtful.

“I did.”

See, he – wait.

I looked at him in disbelief. He had a nonchalant look but a rose glow on his face as he looked at me too. Reaching for my hands, Shaun pulled me close to kiss my lips gently. Kiss after kiss he planted them alternating between sucking the top lip and the bottom.

“I can’t explain it,” he whispered in between kisses. “I want to feel more than last time.”

My body tensed and I pulled away from him, resting my hands on my thighs as I frowned in disbelief. I could never judge when Shaun was curiously moving forward or being genuine. He was relaxed about the most weird of things and angry at the weirdest of times. So I had to assess the moment though it was uncalled for.

“What?” I asked.

Shaun sighed and smiled. “What do you mean what?”

“You don’t have to pretend. I know you wanted to know what it’s like being gay and I guess we don’t have to go this far-“ I began to explain before Shaun grabbed my right hand.

He placed it on his crotch and I stiffened at what I felt. Shaun was rock hard and this time I could feel it through his trousers.

"Shut up now," he demanded.