Chapter 37

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Miki's POV

Finally it's weekend again.

I decided to sleep 3/4 of the day and 1/4 to do experiments. It's what I usually do. 

But today I have confront Luke. I want to make something clear.

The world told me that those who knows that I exist, knew that Luke likes me. And the matter of fact, I'm completely oblivious to it.

Not the fact that Luke likes me but to the rumor itself.

The world is harsh. That's all I got to say. How much suffering should I go through to satisfy them.

My roles are the most important one. I have to protect my family. If not they die.

I should follow yet choose my own path. That's what I decided.

But to whom I see as my disciple and my brother, I have to see what will he choose.

I knock to the door and asked if I can come in. When I open the door, I saw Luke busy doing his research

This office used to be a clean one. But now it look messy than ever.

"What do you need, Miki? It's rare for you to come out from your room"

Let's just go straight to the point.

"Question. Do you still like me?" I said as I gave him a completely blank expression. There were no feelings in my tone or what you can feel.

He knows that I know that he liked me. I don't know now since we're frequently seeing each other.

I just stare at him. I just notice he have grown mature like ani-sama. I think I'm gonna believe they are real sibling.

He was just silent. But at the same time he was thinking. Of why did I just ask this now, what is my purpose, why I just ignore his feelings for me.

"I don't know. There's still a part of me that likes you but at the same time..."

"That feeling is fading?"

He went silent and later, he nod.

I'm glad. Glad that his feeling for me is fading away

With this, he could finally start without me.

"You... To think you would have fallen for someone like me who's lazy and dirty..."

"I was weak at that day. You were there the one who help me, the ruined one"

No one would like to help someone like him. Death only arrives to those who helped him.

"You're a complete stupid. I was just using you"

"Completely using me over a useless things"

I'm both balancing my wishes and my job you know. While using you on a useless thing, I was using you as my shield and to be a guard to protect my family. Overall, I don't hold much feelings other than as my brother.

If the world didn't warn me when I was 8... or 9? or maybe 10? Whatever, maybe... I would have liked you... But knowing danger still arises, I put a boundary between us.

Now that I think about this, I should have like Ian back in the old world but I was too much focus on my wish that I abandoned everything just for it.

Well... it doesn't matter now, does it?

I'm still same. The old me and I is still same. There's nothing new. I'm not dwelling in the past. I'm just preventing something wrong happen again.

"Miki..." Luke's voice drag me back to the reality.

I just looked at him, waiting for his next words. But I know it is something I would definitely regret. I just had that feeling. I wish I just excused myself now and go back sleeping.

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"Is there still a chance for you to like me?"

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