The Devil's Trap

Chapter 33: Ghost of the Past

Chapter 33: Ghost of the Past

Tulad ng mga sumunod na araw, nagising akong mag isa sa kwarto. Wala na ang init na dulot ng katawan ni Landon. All it left was the ruffles on the bed sheet, stating that he was once here with me.

It became a routine. I would wake up alone, make breakfast for myself. If I have the luxury or spare time I would walk into the garden and just sit there. Sometimes I would close my eyes and hear the loneliness of the place. But whenever I think of Landon and how he chose this house for me, I would smile and take a deep breathe and I would start the day.

Classes are becoming bordeline inhumane. Naging busy ako sa mga sumunod na araw dahil sa mga requirements na kailangang tapusin. We are nearly at the end of the year. Konti nalang matatapos na ang lahat ng ito.

Lumalamig na din ang panahon. The chilly morning breeze often nipped my skin whenever I walk down the street to commute for my early classes or early shift at the coffee shop. I like cold weather. At least I have an excuse to stay indoors most of the time.

My relationship with Elyse completely changed. And with everything that I'm going through, hindi ko na ito nagawa pang isalba.

Nagkikita kami sa campus, sa pathways, sa corridors. I would try to smile still, she would nod to acknowledge my presence then continue to walk with her new set of friends.

I wanted to talk to her, ask her what made her do it. I know behind her radiant smile for the crowd, she's still there. The Elyse I knew. The Elyse who is afraid of bugs and alergic to crabs. The Elyse who's real laugh is a combination of snort and laugh.

But maybe, the opinions of people around us affect how we view ourselves, so we choose to show our best foot forward even if the image we curated is not who we are.

Because sometimes, people are savage. You build your self esteem with years of trying to gain confidence, yet a simple kick and you're back to the ruins.

Maybe that's why sometimes, instead of self esteem, people build walls to distance themselves around other people. High, sturdy walls. So if ever someone tried to kick them, they'll be the one who will end up hurting.

Maagang natapos ang aming huling klase upang magbigay oras sa requirement na dapat naming tapusin. Tahimik ang corridor paglabas ko. I was about to head out of campus when Elyse came up to me.

"Here."

Sa palad niya ay isang flash drive.

"I disposed the old laptop and I found some of your files kaya inilipat ko dito. Baka kailanganin mo."

I stared at her. Naghihintay ang mga kaibigan niya sa sulok ng corridor. Kinuha ko ang flash drive mula sa kanyang kamay.

"Elly... I mean Elyse..."

"Yes?" But it came out as tired and forced as our friendship is. She avoided my gaze. Alam kong ginagawa niya lang yon kapag ayaw niyang makita ko ang emosyon niya.

Naging tahimik kaming pareho. Siya ang unang nagsalita.

"I know everything," she finally said. "I know the deal, the contract, I know your relationship with Landon and how you feel about him."

Napakurap ako.

Pilit siyang ngumiti. "Remember when I was at the hospital? Lagi kang nagku-kwento tungkol sa mga nangyayari sayo. I might be immobilized, but I was conscious. Naririnig ko ang lahat ng mga sinasabi mo. From how you agreed to the contract, up to admiting you might be feeling something for him."

"Elyse..."

"Remember how you apologized and said you didn't mean to? You promised it was nothing even if you, yourself was confused of what you're feeling. Para lang mailigtas mo ako bago ako ilipad sa ibang bansa."