How To Be A Hoe

42 | Letting Go

"You're late. Again."

You smiled as you sat down opposite the boy, but it wasn't as bright as usual. "Yeah, I guess I just like annoying you."

He was quiet for a moment. "Do you remember this place?"

Your smile fell. "Our first date."

It was the same secluded area in the same diner where he had brought you for your first date, and it was nighttime. The place was dimly lit by candlelight.

He nodded slowly, lost in thought. "Yes." A sigh escaped his lips, and something about his vulnerable expression told you he was no the same Taehyung from before. He was different—he was raw, stripped bare of his classy charm. "I wanted to..." He trailed off, looking away. "I wanted to tell you..."

You pursed your lips, sad eyes skimming over his lost-looking face. Even after all he had done, you felt sympathy towards the boy. Though he had done worse things in his life, you knew that this situation was unfamiliar to him. He was vulnerable, scared.

"I talked to Lee," you said, before he could say anything else. "I thought you should know that."

His face turned somber, and he sat up straighter in his chair. "She told you."

You didn't reply, but the expression on your face must have been confirmation enough.

Taehyung nodded slowly, comprehending, though his features were tightened in pain. His hand rested on the table, the other in his coat pocket, where the box containing the ring was. One decision, one opportunity, right in front of him. One chance, one choice that could change his life.

If he chose right.

"I'm sorry," he whispered hoarsely, and your jaw tightened. "I didn't mean to hurt you—not, uh, not in the way I did."

You almost scoffed, but stopped yourself. "She said you were trying to protect me. I'm sorry for what I did, Taehyung, I really am, but that just seems very counter-intentional to me."

"No, she was right. In a way." He hesitated. "Stop me if I get too personal, but-well. When I was your—" he swallowed— "your boyfriend, I saw more of you than anyone else did. Even more than Jimin did." There was discomfort in his expression, and you pulled away. "I noticed you, noticed things that no one else would have seen. Whenever you talked about him, or your family, I saw it."

It. One word, so many implications.

"I noticed the little changes in your behaviour, the sadness, the cracks in your bright façade that even you didn't know you had on." He frowned. "I thought I would be able to help you. That we would fight it together, you know? I was so hopeful, and so happy, because this was my first real relationship since—" He broke off, but you knew he was talking about Lee. "And then she happened."

You focused on him, not speaking a word. "I was so scared when I saw her," Taehyung continued, looking down at his hands. "I thought she would tell you, and you would hate me forever. And if you hated me, how could I help you? For the first time in my life, Y/N, I cared about someone more than I did about myself." He shook his head. "I grew to hate myself, even if what I had done was in the past. It was then that I decided that you would be better off in someone else's hands."

"What are you talking about?" Your voice was sharp, cutting.

"Jimin," he stated firmly. "I knew that you two cared for each other, but I didn't know the extent of it. I thought that if-that if I made you leave me, then he would come to you. And help you. My methods were horrible and crass but—" He raised his hands, looking like he didn't know how to say it. "I thought you would believe that I had cheated on you, because that's what everyone had been telling you. If you doubted me, then you would grow to hate me in a way that didn't make you blame yourself. So I did." He shrugged, helpless.