11~Shattered hope

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∞ Nyx's POV ∞

I woke up, groaning as I stretched my aching back. What the hell had happened last night? Did I really enjoy having sex with men now? I glanced over at Agenor, who was still sleeping soundly on his back next to me. My face flushed as I saw him lying there exposed. Quickly, I pulled the sheets up to cover his lower half, and I thought I saw his ribs tense for a second. Making sure I was covered, I sat up and looked out the window. The sun was just starting to rise, its rays filtering through the gray clouds.

If my prediction about the storm is wrong, will Agenor think I'm a liar? I couldn't help but wish for a storm to come, almost like a prayer. It was a foolish thought, but I couldn't shake the feeling of unease.

I couldn't remember how many days had passed since Agenor had saved me. Was it three days? Or four? There was the day I had to drink all the tonics, and the accident on the deck where I ended up with this humiliating collar and chain. Then yesterday happened; I met Maren and two other pirates, and ended up having sex with Agenor. But it didn't feel like consensual sex...I had asked him to stop, but he didn't let go. I felt ashamed of myself. Maybe I should have resisted more? But my body had betrayed me, drowning in feelings I had never experienced before.

I tried to push away those distracting thoughts and focus on the task at hand. It was hard to believe that so many events had transpired in just a few short days - perhaps three or four, besides the duration of the sail with Terry. Assuming we had been sailing south for about four days, we should have already reached Mila. But had my calculations been off? Or did we take a different route? It had been ages since I had sailed this far, ever since my father passed away and Terry took over his business. Back then, I had neglected my studies and succumbed to depression, allowing Terry to persuade my mother to have me involved in the family business instead of pursuing my passion for navigation. If only circumstances were different, I might have relished this journey more.

As I glanced over at Agenor, I noticed he was still and peaceful, his silvery hair splayed across the pillow and reaching out towards me. He looked as charming as he had when I attempted to stab him, but no, I must correct myself, he appeared calm. What was I thinking calling a devil "charming"? Yet again, I wondered if he was truly asleep or simply pretending.

I called out to Agenor in a calm voice. "Agenor, when do you think we'll reach Mila?"

No response. Was he really asleep? I decided to take a chance. "I know you're awake," I said.

To my surprise, he chuckled. "So you can tell if I'm awake now... you're the first," he said with a smile, his eyes still closed. "I guess our activities gave you an advantage."

I rolled my eyes. "I'm just smarter than your usual mates. And you're not as good as you think about controlling your breath," I said, recalling the previous night's events. I had nearly mistaken his breathing for sleep until he had spoken.

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