For the Road

46

Niall follows Liam as he begins to read a few concert signs. Louis and Niall have gotten used to doing that during the short intermission over the last few months. Now, it's like a tradition. Niall follows after Liam hoping to find a few funny ones in the process.

"'Louis, will you pay for my medical school'," Liam reads. Niall looks around hoping to find Louis, but he isn't there. Niall assumes he's gone to the bathroom. He shrugs and keeps looking across the crowds, reading the signs.

"'I love you more than food'," Niall points out. The girl who holds the sign screams loudly and Niall laughs. He watches as the girls around her start freaking out as well and wave, trying to get his attention. Niall throws them a smile before moving on.

A bright sign in the back catches his attention. Niall squints and reads, 'My arms hurt, but it's worth it!'. Niall tries to hold back a laugh as he turns to show the sign to his best friend.

He looks across the stage for a Moment, trying to find the raven-haired boy, but comes back short. Niall furrows his eyebrows and starts back towards the center of the stage and stops as he realizes why he can't find Zayn. He's not here. He left.

Niall's stomach tightens. Of course, how could he forget? Niall catches sight of Liam making his way back over to him and catches Louis joining them out of the corner of his eye. Niall promised himself he wouldn't break down in the front of the fans. He can't. He sucks in a deep breath.

"Are you ready to run, South Africa," Niall shouts. The crowd cheers as the music for their song Ready To Run starts up. Louis begins the song with his verse, which gives Niall time to collect himself before joining Liam and Louis at the chorus.

~_~_~

"Thank you, Johannesburg! You've been a lovely crowd tonight! We wish you safe travels home! Until next time," Liam shouts. Niall gives a wave to the crowd before following Louis and Liam off stage.

He feels someone take his microphone and guitar, but he's too emotionally drained to focus on it. Niall hasn't properly allowed himself to miss Zayn, and it's nearly too overwhelming for him to think about. He numbly follows the other boys to their dressing room to change out of their concert clothes.

The boys all head to their assigned racks. They've been placed in different corners of the room, so they can have their own little space. Niall heads to his corner, trying not to look at Zayn's abandoned rack next to his. Nobody's had the heart to take his clothes away, so they hang on the rack taunting Niall.

"Hey dude, do you have and – are you okay?" Liam asks. Niall whips around and sees Liam and Louis giving him a sad look. Niall sniffs and forces a smile across his lips.

"I'm totally fantastic! What is it you need," Niall questions. He hopes Liam doesn't push him into explaining, but he knows that's not what's going to happen. Liam's a prier. He pries into everything. Niall prays Louis keeps Liam from getting too far into it. The chances, however, are slim.

"No, you're crying. You've got that red ring around your eyes, what's wrong?" Liam pushes. Niall huffs loudly. Niall should have told Liam that Zayn had feelings for Louis. Liam deserved to know that. Instead, Niall sat by and watched Liam get hurt. He justified himself by saying it wasn't his business, but of course it was his business. His friend's feelings should be his business. He had failed them all.

"Just this whole Zayn thing. It's no big deal, really. I'm being a pansy," Niall assures him. Liam's shoulders sag a little and he furrows his eyebrows.

"Zayn's an asshole. You deserve better," Louis explains. Liam shoots him daggers. Niall slumps his shoulders. Of course, Louis would think Zayn's an ass. Zayn was always an ass to Louis. Maybe if Niall has helped more, Louis wouldn't see things that way.

"Don't worry about Zayn. He's really messed up and is taking some time to work on himself. You don't get to blame yourself for that, Niall, I won't let you," Liam tells him. A few tears start to drip down Niall's cheeks. He brushes them away.

"I was his best friend. I should have found a way to help him. I failed," Niall mutters. He can't believe himself. He's failed everyone. There's nobody that Niall hasn't betrayed.

"You didn't fail anyone. He's... just Zayn. Zayn will figure things out on his own, right? He needs some space to sort his shit out," Liam explains.

"That and he's a massive ass," Louis says in a sing-songy voice. Liam glares at the older boy again. Niall knows Louis' trying to lighten the mood, but there's some truth behind it. Zayn ratted Louis and Harry out to Simon. Louis has every right to be pissed.

"I can't help feeling guilty. Zayn was my best friend, so it's my responsibility to make sure Zayn was all right. Obviously, I've done a pretty horrible job at it since Zayn's left. I just keep imaging Zayn crying alone in a room, and it hurts me. I wasn't a good enough friend and, maybe, if I was Zayn would still be here. I feel like I've let everyone down. I should have convinced Zayn to talk to Louis years ago when Zayn's feelings first developed. I should have talked to Zayn about his feelings more. I should have helped Zayn be comfortable in his sexuality. I shouldn't have let Zayn treat you guys like he did. Zayn hurt Louis, you, Harry, and countless others. So many people are hurting because I just... wasn't good enough," Niall admits.

"I know you never meant anything by it. I don't blame you, Niall," Liam reassures. Niall sighs, allowing himself (for the first time ever) to fall apart in front of his best friends.

~_~_~

Hey guys! I've decided on publishing a day early because you guys are 10 comments over the limit, which is the highest you've ever been. Congrats. So far I have @darklove33 and @abby887766 that have said they'll do the epilogue contest. This is going to be no fun if nobody does it! We need at least five people for it to be interesting! Don't be afraid to do it because you don't think you write well! Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed! ~B

ATLC: I hope not. The whole point is to thank the readers by having a reader-written epilogue

Bonus goal: 30 votes and 36 comments

QOTC: What do you think Harry's going to do?