Chapter 38

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Chapter Thirty-Eight

Before the war, we used to play a morbid game of Would You Rather? on the nights we couldn't sleep. Four or five of us would crowd around the kitchen table of whatever apartment Sebastien happened to secure for us that month, nibbling at leftover pizzas and listening to the soft patter of rain against the grimy windows while we traded questions, each one more grim than the next.

As I struggled to pick my way down the narrow road, my vision wavered in and out of focus and I imagined I was playing out one of our more macabre hypothetical scenarios: Would you rather slowly die of silver poisoning or let Ash's pack catch you first?

How many minutes had it been since I leapt through the portal? Two? Ten? Fifteen?

In the back of my head, a niggling voice warned that they should have caught me by now. Killed me by now. With the blood oozing from the gunshot wound in my back, there was no way in hell I could have masked my trail, nowhere I could have hidden, even if I'd somehow managed to summon the strength to try.

It was almost as if they hadn't even bothered to give chase.

Because you're as good as dead, Juliet.

Fear made my heart slam against my ribcage. Darkness gathered in my periphery, tugging at the edges of my vision, luring me closer and closer to the edge. But I had to keep going, I had to get back to Theo. I have to keep him safe, I have to...

God, it hurt to breathe.

The Roaming Troll is only a couple of miles away, I told myself. I tried to focus on putting one foot in front of the other, to ignore the way my whole body seared with pain. A sharp, grinding heat that pulsed from the wound in agonizing waves. Only a few more steps. Only a few...

It was like acid in my veins. I could feel it moving, travelling, edging its way through my system with lethal precision. How long until it reached my heart? Until it completely took over?

Until it burned me alive from the inside out?

In the back of my head, I could almost hear Sebastien warning me that I need to slow my heart rate. "You need to stay calm. If you panic, your heart will beat faster and cause it to move more swiftly through your system." But it was too late for calm. Too late to consider breathing exercises and anxiety management. My heart pounded harder than it ever in my chest with a fear unlike anything I'd ever felt.

I'm going to die. Oh god, I'm going to die...

Each rattling breath sent a spasm of fiery pain through my lungs and the metallic taste of blood and silver surged up the back of my throat. The mantra that once forced me to keep going began to falter, the need to protect Theo slipping from my grasp like sand through my fingers with each second I struggled to remain conscious.

Ricardo will get him to the bar, I tried to reason. Michael will keep him safe. I can just close my eyes for a second...

I tried to shake my head. To fight off the darkness. My knees wobbled and I sank against the wrought iron fence of a nearby building, hands latching onto the cool metal like a lifeline. My body screamed with pain but I knew I couldn't let go. If I let go now – if I let myself fall – there was no way in hell I was getting back up.

Would you rather have your legs hacked off with a blunt saw or slowly bleed out on the side of a road?

Grimacing as another agonizing spasm ripped through me, I tightened my grip on the fence and tried to force another breath into my lungs. My vision swam. The darkness began to encroach further, tugging at my periphery until I could barely see the path in front of me.

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