5. The Tutor

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**You guys get a real good look into carson during this chapter. =)**

"I just don't get it! Okay!" 

"Gracie it's not that hard." 

"Carson, I'm stupid! Might as well give up!" 

I had reached the end of my rope. It's been a week since the incident at homecoming. Rumors went around. I still talk to Viola and Georgia, because they knew that Dawson could be a real jerk, but now I sit over by Carson. I don't know why, but I really don't want to sit anywhere near those girls that attacked me or Dawson. 

Carson isn't happy about me sitting with him, but he tolerates me.  

Anyways it's one of our tutoring sessions and I'm over my limit. I just can't get it no matter what I do. I've been feeling really crappy lately too. I don't know why. I think I might be getting sick. I don't know, but it sucks. 

"Gracie, calm down. Just listen to me." He explained the Algebra problem for the third time and I felt like crying. I don't know what's wrong with me, but I have a splitting head ache and feel like crap.  

"Carson, I don't feel well, can we do this another time?" I pleaded. 

"Don't you have a test this week? I need you to understand this." He said exasperated.  

"Carson, I'm not going to lie. I feel really sick." 

He sighed. "Alright. I guess we can go back over this tomorrow." 

I quickly packed up and ran out of there. I did not feel well. I think I'm going to throw up. 

I sprinted to my room, threw my stuff on the ground and ran to the bathroom and out came my breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Not the greatest feeling. 

*Carson's POV* 

I watched her sprint out of there. She didn't look well. I sighed and packed up all my stuff.  

For the record we are kind of talking again. Not a lot, but she did tell me what she heard Dawson say. 

Frankly I'm not surprised. I've known him for a while, we used to be good friends. He's not a good guy. 

I went back to my dorm. I sent a request to the dean to have a dorm to myself. After my dad got involved he finally agreed. It's nice. I wouldn't be able to handle having a roommate. I'm now so focused on my studies that having someone in my room with me would just irritate me.  

I wasn't always like this. I used to be a pretty bad guy. I did drugs, started fights, got awful grades, and dressed like I didn't own a belt. What changed you may ask? A girl. I met a girl. She was smart amazing, sweet, funny, and perfect. At least that's what I thought. 

We started dating and I changed my whole act for her. My mother was probably the most happy for me though. I stopped doing drugs. I dressed more appropriately. I started actually getting good grades, all for that girl. Maya Ryan.  

Well, an unfortunate series of events unfolded after that. I had to stay late one day at school because of a test I had to make up. Well on my way out I heard something from one of the storage closets. It's the typical sad story. I heard her. I opened it to find her and my best friend hooking up. It was probably one of the worst times in my life, because just a couple days after that my mom was hit by a drunk driver. She was in critical condition for three days then died.  

I don't cry anymore because I cried so much in that time. I considered killing myself, yes. But then I would think of my mom. That's why I strive so hard for my grades. She would want it. She was so happy when I got my act together and I miss her so much. 

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