craving |PERCY JACKSON| [book 1] UNDER EDITING

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"SORRY TO BARGE IN," Percy told him. "We were just, um, browsing."

"You mean hiding from those no-good kids," he grumbled. "They hang around every night. I get a lot of people in here, thanks to them. Say, you want to look at a water bed?"

Selena could tell that Percy was about to say 'no, thanks,' but the man put a huge paw on his shoulder and steered him deeper into the showroom.

There was every kind of waterbed you could imagine: different kinds of wood, different patterns of sheets; queen-size, king-size, emperor-of-the-universe-size.

"This is my most popular model." Crusty spread his hands proudly over a bed covered with black satin sheets, with built-in Lava Lamps on the headboard. The mattress vibrated, so it looked like oil-flavored Jell-O.

"Million-hand massage," Crusty told them. "Go on, try it out. Shoot, take a nap. I don't care. No business today, anyway."

"Um," Percy said nervously, "I don't think..."

"Million-hand massage!" Grover cried, and dove in. "Oh, you guys! This is cool."

"Hmm," Crusty said, stroking his leathery chin. "Almost, almost."

"Almost what?" Percy asked.

He looked at Annabeth, "Do me a favor and try this one over here, honey. Might fit."

Annabeth said, "But what-"

He patted her reassuringly on the shoulder and led her over to the Safari Deluxe model with teakwood lions carved into the frame and a leopard-patterned comforter. When Annabeth didn't want to lie down, Crusty pushed her. "Hey!" she protested.

Crusty snapped his fingers. "Ergo!" Ropes sprang from the sides of the bed, lashing around Annabeth, holding her to the mattress.

Grover tried to get up, but ropes sprang from his black-satin bed, too, and lashed him down. "N-not c-c-cool!" he yelled, his voice vibrating from the million-hand massage. "N-not c-cool a-at all!"

The giant looked at Annabeth, then turned toward me and grinned. "Almost, darn it."

Selena took a step towards her friends and ropes reached out and pinned her to another bed. She let out a cry of pain and Percy tried to step away, but Crusty's hand shot out and clamped around the back of his neck. "Whoa, kid. Don't worry. We'll find you one in a sec."

"Let my friends go." Percy growled,

"Oh, sure I will. But I got to make them fit, first."

"What do you mean?" He asked, confusion floating around his sea-green eyes.

"All the beds are exactly six feet, see? Your friends are too short. Got to make them fit."

Annabeth, Selena, and Grover kept struggling. "Can't stand imperfect measurements," Crusty muttered. "Ergo!"

A new set of ropes leaped out from the top and bottom of the beds, wrapping around their and ankles, then around their armpits. The ropes started tightening, pulling the three from both ends.

"Don't worry," Crusty told me, "These are stretching jobs. Maybe three extra inches on their spines. They might even live. Now, why don't we find a bed you like, huh?"

"Percy!" Grover yelled.

Percy's mind was racing. He knew he couldn't take on this giant water-bed salesman alone. He would snap Percy's neck before he ever got his sword out. "Your real name's not Crusty, is it?" Percy asked.

"Legally, it's Procrustes," he admitted

"The Stretcher," Percy said, the giant who'd tried to kill Theseus with excess hospitality on his way to Athens.

"Yeah," the salesman responded, "But who can pronounce Procrustes? Bad for business. Now 'Crusty,' anybody can say that."

"You're right. It's got a good ring to it." Percy agreed,

His eyes lit up. "You think so?"

"Oh, absolutely," He nodded, "And the workmanship on these beds? Fabulous!"

He grinned hugely, but his fingers didn't loosen on Percy's neck. "I tell my customers that. Every time. Nobody bothers to look at the workmanship. How many built-in Lava Lamp headboards have you seen?"

"Not too many."

"That's right!"

"Percy!" Annabeth yelled. "What are you doing?"

"Don't mind her," Percy told Procrustes. "She's impossible."

The giant laughed. "All my customers are. Never six feet exactly. So inconsiderate. And then they complain about the fitting."

"What do you do if they're longer than six feet?" Percy questioned,

"Oh, that happens all the time. It's a simple fix." He let go of Percy's neck, but before the boy could react, Crusty reached behind a nearby sales desk and brought out a huge double-bladed brass axe. He said, "I just center the subject as best I can and lop off whatever hangs over on either end."

"Ah," Percy said, swallowing hard. "Sensible."

"I'm so glad to come across an intelligent customer!"

The ropes were really stretching his friends now. Annabeth was turning pale. Grover made gurgling sounds, like a strangled goose while Selena kept pulling on the ropes.

"So, Crusty..." Percy began, trying to keep hs voice light. He glanced at the sales tag on the valentine-shaped Honeymoon Special. "Does this one really have dynamic stabilizers to stop wave motion?"

"Absolutely. Try it out."

"Yeah, maybe I will. But would it work even for a big guy like you? No waves at all?"

"Guaranteed." Crusty answered,

"No way. "

"Way. "

"Show me."

He sat down eagerly on the bed, patted the mattress. "No waves. See?"

Percy smirked and snapped his fingers. "Ergo. " Ropes lashed around Crusty and flattened him against the mattress.

"Hey!" he yelled.

"Center him just right," Percy ordered. The ropes readjusted themselves at his command. Crusty's whole head stuck out the top. His feet stuck out the bottom.

"No!" he said. "Wait! This is just a demo."

Percy uncapped Riptide. "A few simple adjustments..." He had no qualms about what he was about to do. If Crusty were human, Percy couldn't hurt him anyway. If he was a monster, he deserved to turn into dust for a while.

"You drive a hard bargain," Crusty told Percy, "I'll give you thirty percent off on selected floor models."

"I think I'll start with the top." Percy raised his sword.

"No money down! No interest for six months!" Crusty begged,

Percy swung the sword. Crusty stopped making offers. He cut the ropes on the other beds. They got to their feet, groaning and wincing and cursing Percy a lot, "You look taller," Percy smiled at Selena,

"Very funny," Selena winced, nudging Percy in the ribs, "Be faster next time."