26 - OVERTHINKING

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REMY HAD BEEN THINKING A LOT ABOUT HIS SLEEPOVER WITH ETHAN. It had been the first one that he had been able to fully get through in almost a year, and it was timed right around when Mark left. Not that he kept track, or anything.

The sleepover, for the most part, was standard, the boys hung out at the park by Ethan's house before coming home and playing video games while eating pizza, Wilma letting them play in the living room while she worked in her room, Treshelle taking the graveyard shift at the hospital.

But, because Remy hadn't gone to a sleepover in quite some time, he wasn't expecting the late night conversations that he and Ethan were having.

"I don't know," he shrugged, glancing down to the phone game the two had been playing as they pretended to be asleep, the humor of the secrecy gone, now only confusion and embarrassment left.

"You can trust me, I won't tell," Ethan pressed, propped onto his arms, and Remy couldn't tell if he was being truthful or if he was just trying to get an answer.

"I don't know," he repeated, because he honestly didn't; considering all that had happened in the past year alone, this wasn't at the forefront of his mind.

"But if you had to choose?" the older boy tried, and Remy honestly had to pause, because now that he got to thinking about it, he couldn't claim he didn't have a clue.

"I mean..." he began, coming to a startling realization that he did, in fact, have an answer, "If I had to choose..."

º º º

The conversation had taken over every aspect of his life. He thought about it as he accidentally fell asleep, when he woke up to the drawings on his body, because he and Ethan agreed that if one of them fell asleep before four, the other had free reign to draw whatever they wanted, but only after after few times they would try to wake the other up, but failed. He thought about it during breakfast and when his mom picked him up, taking him home and letting him sleep, only he didn't sleep, he just thought.

He thought about it at his tutoring session with Peter, not paying attention as he normally did. They got through their homework, but his mind was elsewhere, not realizing that the boy was reporting back to Tony, and had been for a while.

The conversation replayed back in his mind the entire weekend, his thoughts consuming him more and more as he realized the extent of what he had meant, more than what he actually said. It was all consuming and so confusing.

By the time he had to go back to school, he was shaken and almost afraid. He had dragged his feet the whole morning, even going so far as to try and fake sick, but BUDDY had appeared and taken his temperature, reporting back to Birdie that the boy was indeed faking.

That had been something else. The entire weekend, he hadn't spoken to BUDDY. Not once. He had looked over towards his box multiple times, wanting to call him out so they could talk, but he couldn't do it; if he talked about it, that would make it real. It was better he just thought, because even just talking to Ethan about it had been too much talking.

So he went to school and tried to deal with himself, trying not to blush and panic as he partnered with Stephanie Owens, the prettiest girl in his grade with her bright, tooth gapped smile and incredibly curly hair that she wore in two pigtails at the top of her head, she was very smart, but very patient, and even laughed at Remy's lame attempt at a joke.

By the time the bell rang for break, his mind was swimming with so many thoughts and realizations and confusion and fear, and he practically threw himself into Marc, pausing just before he did, just standing in front of him then.

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