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chapter thirteen derry does not believe in tears
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Derry had a reputation—it did not believe in tears. Sure, it was just like any other town, but unlike the others, tears in Derry were taboo. If a kid in the town was caught crying on the side of the road, covered in bruises and blood, the adults would look the other way. Because tears meant weakness, and Derry preferred fear.
The adults, in particular, were influenced by the town. They were afraid. Fear was the reason they steered clear of confrontation and ignored the missing persons posters plastered all over town. It was the reason they never admitted anything and only lies tumbled from their silver tongues. And they took pride in it. They went along with their mundane lives, ignoring the real terrors underneath the framework of the town. But the kids couldn't ignore the monsters in the shadows, not when their own parents were some of them.
Jill forced herself to keep her tears from spilling over her cheeks as the Losers' Club rode to the Kaspbrak residence. She couldn't have Derry thinking she was weak, not when she already knew the truth. The town had already stripped her of everything that had once given her dignity and smashed it into small particles. She felt like a ghost of herself, but she couldn't let Derry see that, at least not after it had seen her cower in fear and break down in the Well House. She had to put on a facade for the time being until she could no longer feel Derry's carnivorous eyes on her.
As the group piled into the lawn of the Kaspbraks' residence, Jill felt like someone was watching her. She quickly brushed off the feeling and hopped off her bike, throwing it to the grass yard as she side-stepped toward Beverly, cowering close to her. The other Losers followed suit and stood out of the way so Mike could lift Eddie out of the basket connected to his bike. They decided leaving Eddie's bike was better than becoming lunch to the monster, so he had to ride in Mike's basket. He set the boy down on his feet, careful not to nudge his injured arm. Jill snapped her eyes down to his arm and cringed. The skin where the bone had snapped had already begun to fade into a purple tint. His injuries made her think of her own and her hands went to her neck. The bruise was gone now, but she could still feel It's hold.
