Beat Of My Heart

Chorus (Fifteen)

Deep breaths, in and out, in and out. That is what I had to keep telling myself as my brain wanted to become dysfunctional and keep me from breathing, keep me from staying alive.

I knew that it was irrational to think that letting Dylan have control over my fears and my pain was the thing that would destroy me in the end. I knew that I was stronger than him.

But the smell of leather and recently cleaned metal infiltrated my nostrils and made me want to tuck my tail and run the opposite way. Blake's comforting arm around my shoulders kept me in place, though, and I was thankful that she was there for me.

She had only just recently met me, and for all intents and purposes we were technically strangers to one another, but yet she took me in like I was part of her family.

I supposed that since she thought I was dating her cousin made her think that I was family already, at least in her eyes.

Large and imposing footsteps echoed throughout the lofty building and I tensed up automatically, thinking that every single footstep was Dylan making his way towards me to hurt me and finish the job that he started at the school.

It was two officers clad in their patrolling uniforms that caught my attention. Well, not them necessarily, but the person who was walking casually between them, laughing like they were old best friends.

I desperately wanted to duck behind one of the desks in front of us, turn around and bolt out of the door that I just came through, but I knew that I had to face him sooner or later.

Sebastian was on the other side of Blake, and although his arm wasn't laid across my shoulders like hers was, I still felt his presence strong and intimidating towards the men heading towards us.

I must have caught his eye, because he started talking to me.

"Got your rockstar boyfriend to fight your battles now huh?"

I looked up and kept my eyes trained on the wall ahead as we walked on, not wanting to stir the pot.

"She wouldn't have any battles to fight if it weren't for you in the first place," I heard Blake mutter next to me. A sly smile escaped my lips and then all hell broke loose.

"What did you say little girl?" Dylan asked, venom dripping from his mouth from the words he had just spewed out.

I wondered how I had never noticed the snake that he really was, the blindness to what was in front of me the entire time that we were together was baffling to say the least.

"Don't," I said quietly to Blake and I looked over to Sebastian and was surprised by what I found.

His face was a mask of cool and collected but when I looked down to his hands I realized he was anything but.

Stark white and clenched into fists, it looked like he was hanging on by a thread.  Honestly, I was hanging on by one as well, but I couldn't let it show. 

As quickly as it happened, it was over, and with a scoff and a shake of his head he turned the corner with his police officer buddies and disappeared out of sight. 

I let out a breath that I didn't know I had been holding and turned my head to look at Sebastian whose green eyes were comforting me without him doing a single thing, and that made me feel more safe than I ever had. 

"Don't worry, it'll be over soon.  A few moments of discomfort for a lifetime of justification," I heard Sebastian say to me.  I saw his lips moving but I didn't really comprehend what he had said until a few moments later when I was standing in a dark room looking at a lineup of men who looked like the monster in the middle.