Abandoned - Negan's daughter (Carl Grimes fan fiction)

Chapter Eleven - Home

Song of the chapter - Paralyzed by NF

Blair

"We're both glad you're back Blair." Maggie said as Glenn stuck to her side. The bodies were getting moved and Deanna got taken home by Nicolas. She was a mess and looked drained. I stared at the couple in front of me and Glenn didn't speak. "Yeah, me too. I'm sorry I left everyone here..." I apologized. Maggie laughed slightly and I bet she wondered what I was sorry for. 

"Blair, none of us are mad at you. I mean Daryl was a little mad because he knew you for a bit but... We all understood why you left." Maggie spurred out and I felt a massive amount of weight on my shoulders. Did they all know now? "What do you mean?" I asked her and she smiled. "You needed air, this place was a lot at once." She said and I could breathe. 

Thank god Maggie said that. Something inside of me thought, everyone here knew about my massive secret. "Yeah, your totally right." "Anyway Blair, it's late we should be going to bed now, so should you. You look beat." Glenn said and Maggie nodded, agreeing with her husband. I smiled at them and said a quick goodnight, then they walked home. 

I panicked so much when I thought Maggie was talking about Negan. I couldn't let anyone know and it killed me inside. I hate keeping this secret from Rick, Carl. Maggie and everyone else like Daryl. But I knew what was right from this moment on.

"Blair." I heard from behind me. I slowly turned around, seeing Carl standing there by himself as everyone else was away home. I sighed and smiled at him slightly. He stood and stared at me for a moment. Right now, I didn't care what happened because, I was in love with Carl Grimes and nothing could stop that, not even Enid.

"You coming home?" Carl asked me and I looked down at the ground for a minute, then back up at him. "Yeah." I said and he held out his hand for me. I gladly reached out for his hand and we walked home. Back to Carl's. It was a quiet and slow walked to his house but it was peaceful. Once we walked in, he shut the door behind me and I walked up stairs. I figured, Rick was already sleeping with Judith in his room. 

When I was upstairs, Carl shut the door behind me again and motioned for me to sit on the bed. It was very quiet and I didn't know why. The whole situation with me and Carl was confusing. Although, I knew I loved him, I haven't told him. I knew Carl will wait until I say I love you first. He never wanted to embarrass himself like he did a few days ago. 

He sat down beside me and laid a hand on my thigh. "Do you want to explain what happened while you were gone?" He asked me and I knew this question was going to appear tonight. I couldn't explain what happened. I tried already but I didn't know what to say. "I can't explain Carl. You wouldn't under-" "-Well help me understand." He interrupted me and I stared up at him. 

I let out a sigh and I knew I was gonna cry in front of him again. "Start with how you are right now Blair. This isn't a difficult question." "Carl! Do you have any idea of what I went through out there... I expect you to know and get it." I said and he looked down for a moment. "Of course, I get it. I just need to know if your going to be okay." He said, laying a hand on my shoulder. 

To be fully honest, I couldn't answer that question because I don't know if I will be okay. From now on, anything can happen to me or Carl. I know that Carl knows, I won't be okay. I knew that. But now, I don't know what I'm gonna do. 

"I don't know how to answer that." I started and he stared at me. "Everything right now, is my fault. Grace is my fault, Lisa is my fault. I don't know how much I can take before I drown in the guilt. It's all gonna end up killing me and I'm so scared..." I said and looked up at him. There was a moment of silence between us two until he spoke up.

"Look, I know there is nothing at all, I can say to make you feel wanted here but... I won't let anything happen to you. Please know that." He said and laid his hand on my cheek now. I don't know whether I believe Carl's words or not. Of course he won't let anything happen to me but what if one day, I'm gone. Then what?

"Carl, it isn't just about that. Enid... Enid told me to stay away from you. She said you were fine without me. I know I'm not her and you don't have to be stuck with me." "Blair, where is all of this coming from? Of course I want to be with you. These last few days were horrible and I know from now on, I can't live without you." He said and rubbed his thumb across my cheek.

"Okay..." "Come on lie down, we need to sleep." He said and grabbed my hand. I laid down as he walked round the other side of the bed. I tucked one of my hands underneath my pillow. Carl laid down behind me and I turned around seeing him face me. "I don't know if I can sleep after today." I admitted to him and he nodded slightly. "I know, love. Just try. I'll be here." He said and wrapped his arm around my waist, pulling me closer.

I gladly accepted his embrace and he sighed slightly. "I'm always going to be here." He whispered and kissed my forehead. I melted into Carl's arms as he whispered those lovely words to me. I know deep down, Carl understands me. I know he knows what I'm going through right now. But I needed him the most and no one else. Finally as Carl stayed awake for me, I fell asleep.

\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\

Faint knocks at the door awoke me from my slumber and I fluttered my eyes open to see Carl asleep in front of me. Soft, soft snores left his mouth and he was sleeping so peaceful. His hair was ruffled and over his eyes. I smiled gently at him and sat up. The knocks at the door still continued and I swung my legs off of the bed. 

I walked over to the door as I rubbed my eyes. I opened the door and saw Daryl. "Daryl." I spoke and he stared at me. "Hey. Rick told me you came back and I'm glad you did." He spoke and stared at me with his hair in his eyes. I studied the way he looked for a moment and he didn't move an inch. 

"Yeah, me too." I admitted to him as I smiled slightly. I always had a thing for Daryl and I knew it would would take a while for him to come around. But now I'm officially apart of the group, I can feel like I have a family here now. "Well, get ready. We got a day ahead of us." Daryl said and walked away from me.

I closed the door and smiled to myself. Suddenly, I felt long, warm arms snake round my waist and pulling me into him. It was Carl. I could always tell by the little marks on his arms which could be beauty marks or moles. But I loved him for how he was. "Good morning." He said into my ear and I knew he was smiling from ear to ear.

"Morning." I giggled slightly as his arms became tighter around me. His finger tips dug into my skin and I couldn't help but laugh due to the movement of his fingers. "Carl!" I giggled and he didn't let go of me. I turned around and saw him smiling so much I thought his teeth were gonna fall out. 

I haven't smiled this much since ever. I knew I was home and I knew home was with that person called Carl Grimes. I snaked my arms around his neck and he stopped tickling me. "You know you look pretty in the mornings right?" He said, laying his gentle, large hands on my waist. I smiled while staring into his lovely blue eyes. 

"You know your lying, right?" I said repeating his words from a second ago. He gaped open his mouth and pulled me closer. "Shut up, I wouldn't lie to you." He said and I believed every single one of his words. I knew Carl would never lie to me but I have lied to him more than fifty times this week. I couldn't help but push away the negative thoughts and smile at him.