tommy shelby: turn of events.

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You were meant to be the women that he loved, the women that he would marry and be with for the rest of his life, the mother to his children and his sidekick but a blonde-haired woman with a personality that attracted Tommy changed all of that without any warning. There was nothing that you could do to stop the man that you had dearly loved for so many years fall in love with Grace so easily.

Despite Grace being extremely deceiving and a cunning liar, Tommy still held deep feelings for her. He had never told you about these feelings - why would he tell his partner that he had fell in love with another women? It was clear though, no words were needed. Even after she had caused a large amount of damage and left, you could see the longing in Tommy's eyes, desperate to see Grace one last time. He announced to the world that he hated her for causing so much trouble but you knew better, Polly knew better, everybody knew better yet nobody said anything.

It all came crashing down when you finally confronted Tommy about his hidden feelings for Tommy. He laughed in your face at first, called you a silly idiot for thinking such a thing and for a second, you agreed with him, what if you were being stupid? But then he wouldn't make eye contact with you, and he shuffled his hands against his desk as if he was trying to find something yet he knew he wasn't looking for anything, he just needed a distraction as his heart was racing heavily as he knew his hidden secret was out in the open.

"You don't love me anymore, Tommy," you mumbled, eyes set on his body as he continued to act busy. "I've known for a while but I've just refused to admit it, didn't want to lose you, don't know how to live with you."

"I do love you," Tommy finally said as he stared down at his desk, parts of his hair flopping onto his forehead.

"Maybe you do, just a little bit, but I know that you love Grace more."

Tommy shook his head, refusing to admit the truth. He feared losing you, despite not feeling the same way about you anymore. You were still his first everything: first kiss, first time, first love. His whole life had revolved around you, for so many years, and he didn't know what to do. Yes, he loved Grace but the chances of her returning to Small Heath considering everything that had happened were slim and even if she did, no-one in the family would accept her. Then again, they all had to abide by Tommy's rules and thoughts considering he was the leader and after a while, they would genuinely begin to accept Grace and you would be pushed out.

At first, Tommy had thought that it was a simple desire and that his feelings for Grace would vanish over the time but it was clear that none of his feelings were leaving anytime soon. It would take time to forget about Grace especially as she had made such an impact on his life, even though it had been unfavourable. Before all of the stuff came out about her being a spy, he had developed strong feelings for her despite him knowing that he had you at home, who he still worshipped, but his feelings towards Grace weren't just going to fade away. Tommy spent longer at pub, hanging around the bar and waiting for Grace to finish serving other punters so that he could speak to her and offer to walk her home, claiming that Small Heath was dangerous once the sun had gone down and people would take advantage of a young women walking home alone with nobody to protect her.

"Let's not talk about this, hey?" Tommy suggested with an awkward chuckle. "I have some business to do in Wolverhampton so I'll be back by supper. Is there anything that you want picking up? I could send - "

"I don't want anything," you interrupted with anger in your tone, letting Tommy know that you weren't going to forget about the argument and that if he continued to dismiss it, the hurt you felt would only grow larger.

"Okay," he mumbled quietly like a young child who had just been told off. Your heart almost broke for him but then you composed yourself and sarcastically smiled and waved towards him until he had let the office. If he wasn't willing to talk about his feelings towards Grace, then you weren't going to act friendly towards him.

John entered the office as soon as Tommy had left. He had picked up on the developing tension that had been putting on a strain on the business and he knew it was down to Grace, even though Tommy was hard to understand sometimes, John knew exactly what you were thinking.

"You alright, love?" John asked as he sat down where Tommy had previously been sat. When you nodded your head, John chuckled before continuing. "There's no point lying to me. You look like a shit."

"You really are a gentleman, you know that?"

"I'm only being honest," John said as he raised his hands in the air.

"At least someone is," you said with a scoff, narrowing your eyes towards that door that Tommy had previously walked out of. His smell lingered in the air, a smell that once brought you comfort before everything had come crashing down around you. "I think it's time to end this chapter of my life, John."

John raised one eyebrow, confusion setting in. "What's that supposed to mean?" He asked, although he already knew. The break-up of yours and Tommy's was imminent and everybody knew it.

"He's been back from the France for just over two years now, and he still hasn't asked me to be his wife. I should've known that he wouldn't want me anymore." You threw your hands up in the air, fully giving up with Tommy Shelby, the way that he acted and the lifestyle that he led. You deserved better than him. "I'm leaving and I mean it. I'm not being second best anymore because nobody deserves to feel like that."

John looked sad at the news, you were his best friend, had been since before Tommy had got with you. "Where are you going to go? Your whole life is here."

With a shrug of your shoulders, you looked over at John and smiled kindly, he had always treated you with respect. "I don't know but I'll keep in touch."

"I don't want you to go."

"I don't really want to leave either but what choice do I have, John? I'm not going to stick around here and watch Tommy slowly fall more in love with Grace and I'd rather get my heartbroken now than later. She'll come running back, we all know it, and Tommy will be there waiting."

John shook his head. "You don't know that, none of us do."

"I know enough and it's all I do need to know. Tommy had his chance and he lost it the minute he looked at another woman romantically. I will not be taken for a fool, especially by him." 

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authors note: please check out my new fic called 'cocaine heart' ill love u forever also follow on tumblr @ tcmmysheiby x 

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