Lucas
"She's a virgin?"
"How many times are you going to say that? Yes, Chris, she's a virgin." I barely manage to choke out the dreaded word.
It's been three days since Scarlett dropped the V bomb on me and to say it's been awkward ever since would be an understatement. We've barely said three words to each other and I think we've been mutually avoiding one another so that we don't have to talk about the most awkward night of our college careers.
"I didn't even know there were virgins in colleges still. I thought girls had, like, a virginity pact in high school? You know so that they come here with experience."
"Apparently not. Exhibit A.- Scarlett. The lone virgin on campus." I grab another beer and pass one to Chris. This virgin fiasco is messing with my head. Virgins are extremely rare in the group of people I hang around with and when one does come into my circle, I make it my mission to stay far away. Virgins make me nervous because I know they tend to get attached quicker and easier than non virgins. Attachment is something I don't need from some random girl whose name I won't remember in the morning. I don't want to be anyone's first if I'm just going to disappear after its over. Of course I wouldn't do that to Scarlett, but her being a virgin just confirms the fact that she's even more innocent than I thought. She's too pure and I don't want to taint her with my ways.
"How did you manage to bag the only virgin on campus?"
"Luck I guess." Truthfully I think this is the universe messing with me. The only girl that I would want to build a connection with, that goes beyond sex, is a virgin.
"How'd it go after she ya know told you about...the situation?" Chris grimaces. I think my older brother is taking this worse than me. He really thought he would have at shot at sleeping with my girlfriend after how dinner went.
I finish off what's left of my beer and reach for another one. When I'm conflicted or confused I drink. I know it's not the best coping mechanism but none of my ways of coping are. Since sex is off the table, and Jeremiah isn't in town to get me a gram, beer is the next best thing. "The mood was completely ruined and I ended up sleeping on the couch with a raging hard on because I didn't think I would survive the night with her pressed up against me."
"Hey, man you're a better person than me. That's for sure." Chris wipes his mouth on the back of his sleeve before taking the last beer in the six pack. "I would have left. Maybe found me a decent looking freshman and took out my frustrations on her."
"What the hell Chris? Firstly it's my house. I'm not just leaving my own house because I didn't get to sleep with her. Secondly what sense does it make to cheat on her with some random ass chick? I want her to sleep with me, not break up with me."
"Okay firstly," Chris says mocking me. "It's technically it's Mom's and Dad's since they're paying for it and all but whatever I still would have left. Secondly, is it really cheating if you're using sex as a coping mechanism? You call it cheating, I call it therapy. Thirdly virgins make me nervous, so yea I would've probably screwed up and fucked someone that isn't a virgin just to calm my nerves. Virgins are too pure for us."
Staring at my brother, I realize that no matter how hard I try to deny it, we're basically the same person. We're both players who use our good looks to get the thing we love the most - sex. We like having a good time and we probably drink and smoke more than we should but it's all in good fun. Most importantly as much as we sleep around we don't sleep with virgins. Chris did once and ended up with a kid. It's the one thing that's makes us different. I know how to pull out. He doesn't.
