XVI

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I jumped on my suitcase, pushing my weight down on it so I could zip it up. Maybe I packed too much, but then again I needed to be prepared. I contemplated leaving my pillow behind but I could never sleep if I didn't have it with me. Or I could always put back some of my sweaters and use Noah's instead. No, that wasn't an option either.

"Jesus Jade, we're only gone for the weekend, not a whole month," Ashton commented from where he was leaning against my doorframe.

"Ash," I breathed. I was surprised to see him back. He hadn't shown his face since the outburst with mom, and I was afraid he wouldn't join our camping trip.

I got off my suitcase and lunged myself at him, nearly knocking him over. My arms hugged him tight around his waist, squeezing him close.

"Uhm okay ... ?" Ashton awkwardly hugged me back, patting the top of my head.

I pulled my head back and looked up at him. "I'm just glad you're back. I'm sorry about what happened with mom the other day."

"Yeah, don't worry about it." He playfully pulled at my ponytail before releasing me.

"I didn't know she was ... you know." I nervously wrung my hands at the thought his dad hurting our mom in that way. "I'm sorry."

"Stop fucking apologizing," he grunted, running both hands through his messy hair. "You think I give two shits about that?"

I shrugged. "Well, I mean she's still our mom, no one deserves to be violated like that."

"That was nothing compared to what she's done to us," Ashton snorted as he sat on my bed, leaning against my suitcase. "You shouldn't feel any sympathy for her. After all the shit she's done, she deserves whatever she gets."

"You mean the fact that she left us?"

"Trust me, that was her doing us a favor," he said. He started going through my stuff, throwing away the things he thought I wouldn't need.

"I think that maybe she's just misunderstood." I don't know why I felt the need to stick up for her but it was a natural response to defend my mother. I didn't know the full story about what she did to Ashton or any of my other brothers, but I couldn't recall her ever purposefully hurting me.

Ashton chuckled dryly. "Yeah, you just don't know shit, Jade."

"What shit?" I questioned. "How do you expect me to understand what you're talking about if you keep me in the dark all the time?"

"Because at least in the dark, you can't see the shit happening around you," he reasoned. "I don't need you to understand me, Jade. I just need you to trust us, to take our side when push comes to shove."

"Of course I'm always gonna pick your side," I commented earnestly.

"Good," he nodded. He picked up something from my suitcase and glared at me. "Now where the fuck did you get this swimsuit?"

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