Chapter Forty-Five

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Eve


            Lucius wrote back to Draco that same night, telling him that the other Death Eaters would be entering the castle two nights from then.

            I'd like to say that I held myself together perfectly the morning before it was going to happen, but I would be lying. Draco and I were walking alone through the empty school grounds when I vomited up what little I'd eaten for breakfast.

            Draco held my hair back as I retched into the grass, my chest heaving and my lungs feeling as though they were about to be coughed up onto the ground. "It's okay," he told me quietly when I tried to apologize with my hands still resting on my knees, my skin pale and a sheen of sweat covering my face. "Don't be embarrassed, Eve, it's just me."

            He helped me straighten back up and I hastily wiped the back of my hand across my mouth, hating that he had to see me like this. But Draco didn't even seem to mind as he brushed the strands of hair away from my sticky forehead, and he looked me over carefully with his hands warm against my shoulders. My hands were shaking badly and it was like my entire body was trembling, but Draco was pretending not to notice—for which I was very grateful.

            "Sorry," I repeated, swallowing hard and not allowing him to interrupt again to say that I didn't need to be sorry. "I'm just—I'm...yeah."

            He seemed to know exactly what I meant. Draco squeezed my shoulders and admitted, "It's alright. I didn't sleep at all last night, I was so nervous."

            Nervous probably didn't even begin to describe the way we were both feeling right now. My skin felt hot and cold all at once, and my chest was so tight that I could barely breathe. I hadn't slept much last night either; I'd tossed and turned for hours before finally giving up, rolling out of bed and then pacing quietly on my side of the dormitory until the sun rose. All I could think about was what was going to happen tonight, but the worst part was that I didn't know what was going to happen. Draco had told me what the plan was, but with the Death Eaters coming into the castle, there was a good chance that people were going to get hurt—and that scared me more than anything.

            "Do you feel okay now?" Draco asked worriedly, still looking at me seriously like he thought I was going to be sick again.

            "Yeah," I replied quietly, my voice scratchy against my throat. I reached for his hand and he grabbed it immediately, like he needed the pressure of my palm against his just as much as I did. "Can we stay outside for a bit? I don't want to go back in yet."

            He nodded, and it was clear he knew exactly what I was thinking. Going back into the castle meant possibly seeing Dumbledore, and just the thought of being face to face with the headmaster while knowing what we had to do tonight was enough to make my stomach turn in on itself.

            So we stayed outside for the rest of the afternoon, but more people began to leave the castle when the sun came out and we both just wanted to be alone. Draco and I went back into the castle and stayed inside the common room for a long time, sitting in the corner away from any other Slytherins. We waited as long as we possibly could, but eventually the sun started to sink towards the trees and we knew it was time.

            There was still a group of fifth years sitting near the fireplace, so Draco and I stood without a word and exited the common room together. Nervous adrenaline was already burning underneath my skin as the portrait door shut behind us, my fingers pinching the lump of my wand inside my pants pocket. Draco held my hand tighter than he ever had before as we started for the stairs, the dull evening light leaking through the windows around us. It was late now and most people were probably finishing up dinner, but we knew the Death Eaters would be coming through the cabinet any time now.

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