Capture My Heart

Chapter Eighteen

It was pitiful, Suzanna knew, but for the remainder of the week she hid inside her room. She had not seen Samuel since that perfect day and guilt mixed with longing the more she thought about him. It was not that she was trying to avoid seeing him - on the contrary, she wished she could spend more time with him. It was that she did not trust herself to hide how she felt about him. She was sure that the moment she was next to him it would become blatantly obvious to everyone that she was, indeed, in love with the captain of the guard.

What else could she do but hide?

The one time she had bumped into him she had practically scrambled away from his touch, awkwardly singing out 'sorry' as she ran away. Surely he was confused. Suzanna felt another wave of guilt. She wanted to talk to him, but she could not risk giving herself away. What if word spread to Caden?

She could not help wondering how Samuel was going with his plans to find Wilson and confront Caden. Suzanna hastily jumped out of her thoughts, realising she had been biting her thumbnail in her anxiety.

Suzanna paced inside her room, wondering how much longer she would be able to stay away from him. A light knock sounded at her door.

Her hopes rose as she ran to answer. Had he come for her? Had he thought of a way they could spend time together away from the public eye? She swung the door open, only to see...

"Rose," Suzanna said, her voice downcast and disappointed. Rose raised her eyebrows in bemusement. "I mean, Rose!" Suzanna continued, trying to sound joyful. In two seconds flat Suzanna was full of genuine excitement. "Rose! I have not seen you since the wedding!" she cheered and gave her friend, now her sister, a big hug.

"It is good to see you Suzy," Rose answered warmly.

"Come in, come in," Suzanna answered, moving aside and closing the door behind Rose. "How have you been? Tell me everything." Not until that moment did Suzanna realise how starved of socialisation she was.

Rose lowered herself onto a cushioned chair and sighed contentedly. Suzanna sat next to her and waited eagerly.

"Being married is perfect. Although I suppose I am not entitled to say that so early on."

"You look happy," Suzanna responded.

"I am happier than I have ever been in my life. Though I have to say, I find the formality and protocol of royalty trying," she admitted.

"You will adjust to it soon. It is not so bad, really. You can do a lot of good as Queen."

"I hope to do so. It leads me to wonder... do you wish you could have been Queen?"

"Oh no, not at all. I grew up always knowing that to rule belonged to Tristan. But Father always told me that if anything ever happened and I needed to take the position that I would be a natural. He says I have the spirit and fight of a ruler. I was never so sure. I do not think I would ever have had the patience or instinct to rule."

"I am not so sure about myself, either."

The two girls giggled.

"Now tell me, what about you?" Rose asked.

"What about me?"

"You seem different," Rose stated.

"Different?" Suzanna echoed.

"Happy. Full of light. Did something happen with the Duke?"

"No, nothing," Suzanna answered, instantly feeling a frown cross her face.

"Then what is it? Something has changed, you must tell me," Rose said with a gentle smile. Suzanna hesitated. What would Rose think if she admitted all that had happened between her and Samuel? Would Samuel want Rose or anyone else to know? Rose was waiting patiently. Suzanna could tell she would not push her for details if it was obvious Suzanna did not want to share.