Pretty Please Don't Pinch Me

80. Memory Lane

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I lay there awake, unable to fall asleep. My head rests against his chest, and not even the comforting steady rise and fall of his chest combined with his heartbeat can put me to sleep. The early morning sun now streams through my bedroom window and I look up at him.

I love asleep Harry. Sometimes even more than I love awake Harry. Because when he's asleep, his worries and concerns are no more, and –

"Stop looking at me," he mumbles, his eyes remain closed.

"I wasn't," I lie, before fessing up, "How'd you know?"

"Because I can feel your eyes on me," he answers quietly. "Imagining me naked I suppose," he muses, smiling at his horrible attempt at a joke.

"But I know what you look like naked," I say, rolling my eyes.

"Oh, right," he smiles, as if this was news to him. "Did you get enough sleep for today?" he asks, squeezing my side.

"Plenty," I lie, yawning.

The truth of the matter is that I lay awake all night, trying to sleep but unable to due to my guilt. I know I need to tell him. I will tell him. But just not right this second. Not before the public opening of Ava Rose.

"I was thinking maybe we could go out for dinner to celebrate maybe? There's this new place that I've heard about that –"

"Dinner sounds great," I say, interrupting him.

Dinner is where I'll tell him.

"But what about if we maybe do it here?" I suggest, hoping he will agree. The sooner I tell him, the better, and the longer I leave it, the worse I'll feel. Having it here means we can be real. He can shout, and yell, and call me all the names that I deserve, but at least it will be real. "I don't want anything big. Just you and me."

"Perfect," he agrees, kissing the top of my head while I hear his heartbeat growing steadily quicker.

"What's the time?" I ask him.

"It's still too early to get up," he answers, covering his wristwatch with his hand.

"Harry! Don't be silly. I can't be late!"

"It's 8:14am," he finally tells me.

"Oh, fuck," I mutter under my breath as I jump up.

I don't get very far before Harry's arms quickly envelop around me, bringing me back against his chest, holding me hostage.

"Harry, let go!" I laugh, trying to wriggle out of his impossible grasp.

"We have plenty of time. Don't most stores open at 10 anyways?"

"I need to be there earlier!" I say disjointedly as I try to get out of his hold.

"Don't struggle, you're only making it worse," he says, and I don't even need to be looking at him to know he's extremely entertained by this position. It's in the way he speaks – with that annoying lighthearted trace of amusement.

I am going to kill him if he doesn't let me go.

His arms wrap around my chest, holding me in place and I do what any girl would have done in that situation.