Confessions of a Muslim Girl

Chapter 30 -- My Crazy Family, Love, and Heartbreak

Hello lovely people! Have fun with this chapter. DON'T FOCUS ON THE ROMANCE. THERE ARE OTHER LESSONS TO BE LEARNED!!!

I REPEAT, DO NOT FOCUS TOO MUCH ON ADAM AND MAYSA. YOU WILL MISS SO MUCH IF YOU DO.

"Not everything concerning love and attraction is painful, Maysa." -- Zakariya Malik, COAMG.

 Chapter 30

My Crazy Family, Love, and Heartbreak

☼ Maysa Malik ☼

            My hand turns the knob, and my first glimpse at what’s past the door I just opened is enough to make me reel back. “Maysa?” Adam stands up quickly. I keep my eyes on the floor to shield my face from view, but I can see him straighten and stand up.

            Knowing I’m going to have to face the music some time or another, I whip my face up quickly with a fake smile on my face, so quickly that my head protests in pain. Shut up, head. “Hey! Sorry, wrong room. I’ll catch you later.”

            I spin around, the material of my dress tangling around my legs, and start to walk away. “Mays, wait. Shazia, can I talk to Maysa for a second?”

            Shazia reaches over and places a delicate hand on Adam’s broad shoulder, and the size of her hand and his shoulder is a sharp contrast. “Yeah, no problem. You know where to find me.” Adam stares at her for a second, it’s only for a second, but the reality is that her hand is still on his shoulder and it takes him a prolonged second to gently push it away.

            Shazia saunters out of the room, and it looks like she’s about to bump her shoulder against mine, so I discreetly angle myself away from her. I don’t miss the look she gives me. After she leaves, I look up at Adam.

            Those eyes that I’ve always loved lock with mine and before I completely lose it, I walk past him into the room and sit down on a couch. “What do you want to talk about?” I bring my legs up onto the couch and rock back and forth gently with my arms wrapped around my legs.

            He sits a couple of feet away from me, on a desk chair. He runs his hands through his hair a couple of times. “I-look, Mays, um…what you saw just now…well, it wasn’t what it looked like.”

            “Ok.” Then what was it really? That’s what I want to ask, but in my heart I know that Adam is a good Muslim, mashallah. But just the fact that she was all over him like that….

            He’s not looking at me. He’s looking out the window that for some reason doesn’t have the curtains drawn even though it’s getting late out. I observe his face and I know that he’s nervous because he’s rubbing his thumb against his palm. You don’t go eight years without picking up things like that about a person, especially the boy who was your first crush.

            “Shazia kind of just had her arm around me. I was telling her to stop when you walked in.” I bite my lip and nod at him. The relief washes over his face and he grins at me, and then smirks playfully.

            I don’t know what it is about that smirk but it pisses me off so much. I think it’s because it feels like he thinks that with just one sentence everything will go back to normal. Before I can stop myself, I blurt out, “Guess you weren’t fast enough to tell her to stop though, huh?” I said it out of jealousy. I will admit this straight up. I made that sarcastic, condescending remark out of jealousy. I wish I could talk it back, I wish I could be a better person, but no one alive can always be an angel, right?