Kissing Men (BoyxBoy | Mature)

Chapter Forty-Eight

Jay dropped our clothes and the towel in the laundry basket in his room before he sat down on the bed, stretching. 

"You know, I'm actually debating between teaching you how to lap dance or eating chocolate spread off you like I said I would," he said, looking at me. He was leaning back, his hands on the bed, supporting him. 

I bit my lip, still standing near the door. 

"We've got time for you to decide. In the meantime..." 

I pushed the door shut and walked over to him slowly. He licked his lips quickly as he looked up at me. When I got to him, I straddled his lap and scratched down his chest. A slight moan escaped his mouth and his eyes closed briefly. 

"Kaidan..." he breathed as he looked up at me. 

"You are so hot, Jay," I whispered against jaw as I kissed along it to his lips, but pulled away a little when he moved forward to kiss me. "Nuh-uh. I'm in charge tonight."

I put my hands on my chest and pushed him hard until he was lying down. 

"Kaidan, please," he whispered. 

"Please what? What do you want?"

I kissed down his chest slowly, nipping and sucking occasionally. When I reached his boxers, I grabbed hold of them with my teeth and pulled down. He kicked them off, breathing heavily. 

"I..." Jay swallowed hard. "I want you to fuck me, Kaidan. I want to feel you inside me..."

His voice was shaking with fear. I pressed a kiss to the inside of his thigh and stroked over his hip, hoping it would comfort him. 

"Are you sure?" I asked. "We don't have--"

"Yes. I'm sure."

Despite the quiver in his voice, he sounded like he knew what he wanted. I nodded a little and reached over to the bedside drawer for the lube I knew he kept there. I handed it to him before searching for a condom, sitting back with it when I'd found one. 

"I... What do I do?" I asked, blushing with embarrassment. 

He smiled a little and stroked my cheek. "Put plenty of lube on your fingers."

I nodded and sat back, taking the bottle back from him and popping the lid, smearing some all over my fingers. While I got my fingers all lubed up, Jay brought his legs up and spread them. 

I vaguely remembered how he'd prepared me, how careful and gentle he'd been. I had to do that for him now. I'd said I was in charge, so I was going to be in charge. His breathing was irregular and his hands were trembling. He was nervous, scared even. 

"Baby... We don't...." I started. 

"We do," he said. "I want to. I have to do this."

"But... I'm not making you, am I? I'd never--"

"You'd never force anyone into anything, kitten... I don't need to do this for you, I have to do it for myself. I'll... try and explain later."

I nodded a little and slipped my first finger inside him. He tightened around me and a whimper escaped him. Not a whimper of pain; a whimper of anxiety. I moved my finger a little and slowly slid in until it was all the way to the knuckle. He took a shaky breath, his eyes screwed shut. I leant up and kissed him softly. It was a moment before he returned it. His fingers were clinging onto the sheets for dear life, like it was the only thing stopping him from running. 

I moved my finger again slightly. I needed to stretch him, I realised. I circled it round slowly as far as I dared, making him gasp. I carefully added a second finger and kissed away the lines of pain over his face. He was too beautiful to be visibly in pain. Circling round again, I scissored my fingers inside him, trying to stretch him more. I moved them slowly, not wanting to hurt him.