Us. (HIStory2 越界 - Crossing the Line: Zhen Wen x Zhen Wu)

At the Tip of Your Tongue (Zhen Wen)

          

"Ge." I nudge his shoulder. He doesn't move. "Zhen Wu," I say in a louder voice. He takes in a sharp breath and looks disoriented. "We're here."

The bus has stopped at the station near our house, and some people are starting to get off.

"Come on," I say, hurrying him to stand up and walk before the bus door closes. The journey from the station to our home usually takes around 10 minutes, 5 if we run (which we did a lot when we were younger, racing to see who could get to the house the fastest), but that's quite impossible right now. So we're just going to take it easy. Zhen Wu is ready to sleep any minute now.

"When you take a shower later you won't be sleepy anymore," I tell him.

"Then I don't need one." His lets out his raspy sleepy voice.

"Ho! Zhen Wu doesn't want to take a bath after a long day of exercising and sweating! Never heard of that," I say.

He exhales sharply through his nose. Zhen Wu is somewhat a clean freak. He always makes sure his room is spotless, his body the same, and he always takes care of how he looks (not that he needs any though, he's too... good looking for his own good) (he doesn't realize it).

We arrive in front of our house, and Zhen Wu unlocks the gate and the front door. Even as we walk along the front porch we can already smell heavenly food our Mom is cooking.

"Oh gosh, I'm so hungry," I say under my breath while taking off my shoes.

"We're home!" Zhen Wu calls. I can't really hear what Mom says after that, but her voice comes from the kitchen.

We go up the second floor directly where our rooms are located. I actually half-run up the stairs. If I could skip all the showering rituals and go straight to the dining table, I would. But the stickiness accumulated since the morning almost makes me cry. Even I can't take it, how can he say he won't clean himself?

Zhen Wu follows quietly behind. I pause when I arrive in front of my room, looking at Zhen Wu who just arrived on the second floor. I wait until he arrives at his room opposite mine.

"Are you going to use the bathroom?" I ask him.

"Uh... you go ahead," he replies, absentmindedly looking at our shared bathroom at the end of the hallway. Truthfully, I don't even need to bother asking because he always goes after me, whether it's in the morning or evening, no matter how long I take, but I thought since he trained so hard today he'll want to quickly wash up and rest.

"It's okay, you can go. I know you want to rest right away, but cleanliness is a priority too," I say as I tug the end of his shirt, looking at his crooked tie.

He doesn't say anything for a moment. Dreading the silence, I look up to his face. He's smiling. I feel his hand reaches for mine and he pulls me closer. "I'm fine, I'll wash up after you."

I feel the heat slowly spreads to my whole face. He's too close, this isn't good. I pull my hand slowly so he doesn't think that I don't want to hold hands, or that I want to forever hold his hand. Either way, I directly enter my room after mumbling something I can't even understand, praying he doesn't see my stupid blushing cheeks.

I close the door behind me, listening to what he's going to do next.

Silence. What is he doing?

After a few heartbeats, I hear the door of his room closes. I let out a breath I don't realize I held. Why did he linger?

I throw my bags and begin to undress, leaving only my pants on and I take my towel. Right as I open the door, Zhen Wu also opens his. I am so shocked I jump back.

"Y-you want to go first?" I stutter, lifting my towel to my chest because I'm suddenly self conscious of my naked torso.

"U-uh... sorry, you can go."

I mumble okay and walk past him.

"Zhen Wen," he calls.

My heart drops a little. I turn around to look at him.

Silence. Our eyes meet. His lips are half open, words at the tip of his tongue. I wait. And I wait. He doesn't say anything.

"Sorry, it's nothing," he finally says. His face conflicted, and then he disappears into his room.

I am stunned. What do you want to say, Zhen Wu?

I enter the bathroom and stand in front of the mirror. This happens a few times before—him stopping before saying anything. I know he's been thinking a lot, especially after what happened lately, but it doesn't help any of us if he says nothing...

I quickly shower so Zhen Wu doesn't have to wait very long. Who knows if he's already asleep right now?

Upon finishing, I actually contemplate knocking on his door to tell him he can use the bathroom now, standing in front of his door for a few seconds. When my hands almost touches the piece of wood, I stop myself. I can hear some music playing from his phone, that means he's awake. I'll just silently go back to my room.

After a few seconds, I hear Zhen Wu's door opens and closes, his footsteps getting further away. I keep thinking of what he wanted to say. Some unwanted thoughts can't help but cross my mind. What if he thinks this is a bad idea? What if he wants to go back to how things were before I accidentally confessed that night? What if he doesn't want to take this relationship further...?

But then I remember... he held my hands on that bus. He leans on me when he's tired. He's unselfish when we're together. He cares for me. He knows.

At least I still have that sliver of hope to hang on to.