CC7

CC7 - Part 17

 “I…” it was my third attempt but my voice was trembling and I still had no idea if I should say it or not.

Feeling her warm breath on my neck, and the way she held me so tightly to comfort me was confusing me more than anything. Was this all part of the deal? I was never certain if Lauren actually liked me, or if I was just another conquest on her apparently extensive list. It wasn’t that I minded her being sexually experienced, but it made me question if my hopes were all pure nonsense.

I couldn’t tell her how I felt, but I was starting to calm down.

“Do…you even like me?” it escaped my lips and Lauren pulled back instantly to face me.

“Of course I like you”, she replied shocked that I would ask such a thing. “That’s crazy talk, why wouldn’t I like you?”

“I don’t know”, I sighed in frustration and closed my eyes for a moment.

“Camila, it’s okay if you’re not sure about this”, Lauren kept being her considerate self, which was almost aggravating at this point.

“I want to implement another rule for our arrangement”, I blurted out and saw the older one’s eyebrow kinking.

“Okay, what is the new rule?” she asked calmly.

“We have to be completely honest with each other. Even if it might hurt the other one’s feelings”, I said as assertively as I could in that situation.

“Alright, honesty is a given I think”, she complied with my wishes, and started stroking my cheek with the back of her hand.

“Then answer me honestly now: what did you do last night?” I couldn’t stop myself even though my voice was quiet and insecure now.

“I studied”, Lauren answered with a bewildered expression on her face. Tears started swelling in my eyes once more because she was obviously lying according to the text message I had read.

“What did you study?” I kept going in hopes to uncover her lie.

“What does that have to do with anything? And why are you interrogating me”, she was more than confused apparently.

“Just be honest”, I pressed.

“I am being honest”, she defended herself and withdrew her hand from my face. “There is a really big exam coming up and I invited Brittany over. She’s in my ‘Architectural Technology and Materials’ class and we managed to feed off of each other, cramping in so much material, that it was probably the best study session I’ve ever had. I needed to do that so I could even come here. Otherwise, I would have needed to stay home to study.”

Remembering the text message from Brittany, I realized I had completely jumped the gun. By the way Lauren talked and looked at me I knew she was being sincere. So that had been her ‘incredible night’. And that was why Brittany wanted to repeat it next weekend. I felt like the biggest idiot for making such a hasty assumption. Lauren seemed a little angry that I was pressuring her so much, and she had every reason to be. She had made an effort to visit me, learned her subject matter ahead of time, so we could spend time together. Here I was making her feel bad for something she hadn’t even done.

“I’m sorry”, I apologized and took a deep breath. “I don’t know what’s going with me.”

“It’s okay but please don’t cry because that’s the last thing I wanted to happen”, her voice softened again and I nodded gently. I knew what she wanted to happen, and now that I was sure she hadn’t hooked up with someone else, there was no reason we shouldn’t go through with it. Wiping the last salty streaks off my face, I tried to get back into the right mood so to speak.