Perfect Fate ✔

33. No Matter What

Her..

"Emma, dammit." Jake walked over to me.

"What are you talking about? What did I say? Whose name?" I asked as we got into the room again with Dean following.

"Nothing. Sit down." Jake wanted to walk me to the bed but I slightly pushed him away.

"No. Dean, talk to me. Please." I I frowned at the eyes I was so badly in love with.

"Emma, don't worry about anything and just rest. You have to rest." Even though he was furious with Jake and obviously with me too, his eyes were still soft and caring.

"Dean, stop it. Just tell me." I begged.

Whatever it is, I want to know so I can fix it. I want him to be okay again.

"Please, Emma, please. Just rest." He looked at me, so tired and defeated, like he no longer had the energy to argue, so I did as he said and laid back down on the bed.

"There. I'm resting. Now please tell me what's wrong? What did I do?" I frowned.

"Emma, don't worry about it, now." Jake stepped closer to me.

"No. Stop it you too. I know you're only trying to help, Jake, and I really appreciate it. But Dean knows me better than that. He knows that whatever it is, he needs to spill." I turned to Dean, "Dean, talk to me." I looked at him as he ran his hands through his hair in desperation.

"Dean!" I yelled, grabbing his attention.

"We will talk about this later, I promise. Just not now. Please, Emma, not now." He shook his head, as if he didn't know what to do.

"I need to know what happened. Why are you being so distant? I know I did something for you not to gather me in your arms already, but I can't remember what! Just tell me." I insisted and he sighed, knowing that I wouldn't had stopped nagging until he had given up.

"When you woke up.. you said his name. Your ex." He said, looking straight into my eyes, allowing me to see how hurt and confused he truly looked, and I hated that look so terribly much.

"Why would I say Matthew's name?" I frowned, thinking out loud.

"I don't know, and it truly doesn't matter right now. Let's just get through this, first, okay?" He ran his hand through his hair again.

No. That means that you will stay distant and mad and hurt all the while, and I can't have that.

"No. It's bothering you, I can see that. Do you think.. do you think I still love him? Is this why you're so mad, Dean?" I asked, frowning.

"I'm not mad." He shook his head, and I got my answer.

"I don't know why I could've said his name, but I do know that I'm not in love with him. I just thought you knew that too." I shrrugged, and even though I understood how he felt, It still hurt a little.

"Emma, I--" He started.

"Look, Dean. I'm your girlfriend. We almost slept together. I wouldn't do that if I was in love with someone else." I spoke softly.

"I know that." He frowned.

"I'm not sure that you do, and like you said we will talk about this later. However, just keep it in your mind that I don't know what happened or why I said his name, but I'm positive a hundred percent that I most certainly do not love Matthew." I assured.

Yes, a part of me is so mad at him for thinking that I might still be in love with Matthew, but I get it. I really do. I know Dean and I know how insecure he can get when it comes to me, and maybe I haven't done enough to show him how much I love him or care about him, but I think it's about time I start doing so.