Bitter Affectionate

Chapter 5

For the next few days, I continued to think about Calvin, what Brent had said to me, Hally and, for some unknown reason, Joseph.

I began to see him everywhere. After school at football practice, I'd see him in the schools computer lab, going over things with the robotics club. Driving home from Brent's on Wednesdays, he'd be on his way to the library, like before. I began to notice classes that he had before or after me, so we'd pass each other in the hall. I had never really seen him around school before, and but I was seeing him all the time. Or, maybe, he was just easier to spot now that I knew what to look for.

My phone stayed in my pocket, only used for my uncle, and occasionally a classmate of teammate that needed me. I spent any of the time that I did have my phone on staring at that stupid message until I felt myself go insane. I was delving into madness, and it wasn't getting any better.

After practice one day, I waited up. Brent had an appointment with his family counsellor and didn't want me to bring him. Some days, I would drive him there, and play the acoustic versions of his favourite songs to calm him down, because the sessions always stressed him out. But, the counsellor told him that he should learn not to be so dependant on me.

So, I stayed after everyone left, expecting to be able to leave the school without having an awkward incounter with Joseph. It wasn't that I didn't like him, it was that I was afraid of one day liking him more than I should. He seemed like the type one could only hope to fall for, and I couldn't fall for anyone. Not yet.

Inevitably, because my luck was about as good as a black cat that lives it's life for breaking mirrors and dancing under the glimmer of a metal ladder, I bumped into Joseph.

He was carrying two boxes that were tall enough to cover his face, so I didn't know it was him until I'd passed him, and I felt myself sigh internally. He was struggling so much to carry his stuff that my stupid good person attitude had to come back so I could help him.

"Hey, slow down, idiot," I said, more frustrated with myself than him, and snatched one of the boxes so we both had an equal load. "How did you expect to get around without being able to see in front of you?"

He shrugged, but didn't scowl or make a face. He must have been in a good mood.

"The luck of the Irish?"

"You're Irish?"

"No, but I know someone who is, and I was testing if it was rubbing off on me."

I rolled my eyes and he smirked proudly. I found myself wanting to laugh. What he said had been amusing, and I wondered why I hadn't laughed at it.

"Where are we bringing these?" I asked, ignoring a feeling in my stomach that told me I should have laughed. Why did I have to overthink everything? Clearly he didn't think it was weird!

But, we got along so well last time, and I should have been polite and laughed at his joke.

I shook my head when he wasn't looking at me, hoping to see images of the words in my brain falling out, but all I saw was hair falling in the way of my vision. I pushed it away with the corner of the box.

"The storage room, downstairs."

"Alrighty."

We brought the boxes downstairs, and I thought I'd get through it in a nice silence like the ones we had in the library parking lot, but I wasn't so lucky.

"Why are you here so late? I saw the rest of the team leave a while ago," He said, opening the door to the stairs with his elbow and holding it for me with his foot until I walked down ahead of him.