It has been over a year since the murder of his wife, Lily, and James Potter wishes every day that it is simply a nightmare that he will wake up from. Unfortunately, it isn't and in the wake of her death, James finds himself as a single parent to th...
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Part of James and Renata both wished that they had never confided their true feelings in Sirius, not because they didn't trust him to say anything, but because it was the only thing that they could really think of from that moment on. The two of them had almost found themselves rather content with pushing back their feelings of attraction towards one another, it left a less awkward air about it all. However, now that James had actually confronted and realised his developing feelings towards Renata, he could hardly concentrate on anything else. Suddenly, he became of every little thing about Renata that he found to be absolutely perfect.
Such as the effortless beauty that she often exhibited even when she had just woken up in the mornings. Her hair was normally all over the place, a sleepy look in her eyes as she could barely keep them open sometimes, and yet, there was a smile on her face regardless. A smile that carried from her lips to her eyes that made anyone around her suddenly feel like they were in a better mood. He liked that she enjoyed wearing dresses as much as she enjoyed wearing trousers as her figure looked great dressed in both.
There were times where he caught her reading to herself and witnessed all the expressions she made, whether it was a confused, bewildered, excited, or troubled look, each one was downright adorable. She was a storyteller, definitely appreciated by Harry as she dared to be the silliest she could be when reading to him at night before bed. She made faces, changed her voice, and made a complete fool out of herself many times, just for a chance at making Harry laugh.
James was caught up in the smoothness of her skin, the flicker of light in her eyes, the curvature of her lips, and how all those features seemed to fit perfectly as if they were all pieces of a puzzle that were put together.
How he had managed not to notice all the things before when it came to her physical beauty, he had to assume that through his grief, he had put up blinders, believing that it would be wrong for him to ever look at another woman again after Lily's death. But Sirius had spoken to him, telling him how ludicrous it would be to sacrifice his own happiness for such a reason. Sirius had reassured him that Lily would never want James to be sad or grieve for the rest of his life.
There was a reason he had survived and that was to live on, and what was the point of living if James wasn't going to live it to his full potential?
As inspiring and encouraging as Sirius' words were, James still found himself extremely nervous because he had no idea how Renata felt towards him. There were a lot of risks that were involved and he was nervous about taking any step out of his comfort zone at the time. Renata still wasn't even on a first name basis with him consistently as she still called him "Mr Potter." He had to believe that those formalities were set for a reason, maybe she only saw him as nothing more than a friendly employer.
Sirius encouraged him to talk to her about it and even brought up the wild idea of asking Renata out on a date, but James immediately put up a protest to it all. Suppose he did ask her on a date and the worst occurred where Renata rejected the invitation. James wasn't sure if he was in the right state to handle rejection, not to mention, if she became aware that he was developing feelings for her and she didn't feel the same, that would leave her to feel uncomfortable. Which ultimately, in James' mind, meant that she would leave.
